Kiss of Death- Dave Mustaine Fanfiction

Wallow in a Sea of Sorrow

Call off the chase
Walls of thought, strong and high
As my castle crumbles with time...
I think of you
Oh, yes I do
Such a crime You opened fire...and your mark was true
You opened fire...aim my smiling skull at you
You opened fire... I live tomorrow, you I'll not follow
As you wallow in a sea of sorrow - Alice in Chains 

When I woke up the next morning my hair was a mess, my blue eyes were bloodshot, and my makeup from the other night smudged and ruined. I was trash, and now I looked like it too. I looked around my room once more. It was emotionally bare. Sure, all my past academic awards surrounded me, and all of my instruments that I have grown to adore were here too, however, none of this really meant anything to me. This just felt like some hell. All the praise and recognization I was given over the years made me less of an individual and more of a prop for my mother. I was just property of my mother; just meant to show off how amazing of a mother she is and that's it. And for a while I thought she was doing just to better me, but my sense of self-determination and rugged individualism was all stripped away from me.

What was I really? Sure, to those on the outside I was a somebody. Great grades, great docile girly personality, and an ambition for politics, but what was I beneath all of that? Beneath all of that I didn't know. I wasn't a person. I was merely my achievements. Miss Nameless. Miss Nothing. Miss Nobody. On the surface I was pretty, however, beneath all the fake smiles, dresses, makeup, I am the girl no one can look in the eye. Not because I was that pretty , but because only dark and empty voids filled them.

I sat on my bed for what seemed like hours completely dazed out, unaware of the world and those around me, all of my senses numbed due my conscience's own self evaluation of me and the realization of the situation I have been planted and stuck in ever since my own conception. My heart was lost in the dark. I was completely isolated in the void of self-critic that I have blocked out everything from the outside world. It wasn't until I heard a soft pattering off in the distance that soon grew into loud thumping and than banging. 

'Who could that be?' I thought to myself. It wasn't coming from the door so it couldn't be my mother. It seemed to be coming from the window adjacent to my bed, but what could it possibly be? It was far too loud to be something like a small bird or rodent like a squirrel or chipmunk. Curiosity was killing me so I stood up on my bed and pulled back that curtains that were sheltering me from the outside.

I gasped in shock. It was you. How did you get here? Sure this was the second floor, but I wasn't that athletic to hook myself into a tree and climb myself up. You were eagerly banging at my window urging me to open up. I opened the window and you immediately fell in onto my bed as I gasped once more covering myself in the bed's comforter.

"David! What are you doing here?" I silently screeched still in shock.

"Shhhh!" You insisted on me being silent. "You don't want to wake up your dictator of a mother do you?" I slightly shook my head no as I began to slightly lower the blankets from my small form. 

You focused your gaze upon my face and noticed the smeared makeup and a large red handprint stuck across the right side of my face. You immediately grasped my face and began to softly caress it. I jumped in shock, but was welcomely surprised by how soft and gentle you were towards me.

"I'm sorry, for leaving you." You muttered out.

You began to fish through you back pocket in search of something until you pulled out the soft white fabric that seemed to be used to clean glasses or as a handkerchief. You then began to delicately pat my face cleaning away all the runny, sticky, and caked up make up that was still present on my face from the previous night. Once it was all cleared you pulled me towards your own lanky and warm body as a method to trying comfort me. Immediately after you did that I began to burst into soft whimpers and tears. You were the only one to ever emotionally comfort me once I was hurt. Such actions were a foreign concept to me.

'Why do you care?' I thought. 'Out of everyone why do you care about an awkward antisocial weirdo like me?' Were you just planning on using me or did you really care? I really truly wanted to hate you, but why did you have to act so nice?

You only pulled me closer to you as I continued to weep into your shoulder uncontrollably. It wasn't like I wanted to cry either. Such emotions were condemned and seen as weak. However, at this very moment I couldn't control it any longer. It just burst from within me and surged out like a river with no endpoint. I was drenching you within my s

You pulled me onto your lap, gently ran your fingers through my messy and unmade hair, and rubbed gentle circles into my back. This was the first time I have ever properly experienced true sadness, ache, and pain but you were right there to comfort and protect me. 

That morning I thought of you and only you. What a crime yes I know, but I knew now for sure that there was no way of helping, hindering, ceasing, or stopping the compassion I felt for you and you alone. I'll live for another morrow, and I'll follow. But I'll never forget and always remember how you allowed me to wallow in a sea of sorrow.

A/N: Cheesy I know, but I thought it was kinda cute. More chapters coming soon.