Gravity Falls REBORN

Can't Af-Ford To Fail

My heightened senses are tingling...specifically my smell. 'Seriously, what smells so good?'  I poke my snout in the air and sniff around. 'Oh...it's the stew my BROTHER IS GONNA GET COOKED IN!'  I internally face palm at my idiocy.

"And now, a little math problem: when I subtract your brain from your skulls,  add salt, and divide your family, what's the remainder?" I turn to hear Probabilitor bashing Dipper and Ford on their noggins.

Out of nowhere, I hear shuffling in the nearby bushes and out pops Mabel's voice in all her glory, answering the evil wizard's question just in time, "YOUR BUTT!!" from behind said bushes.

"What? My butt isn't part of this particular equation." Weird Al's character looks around obliviously.

"Drat! How did you make it past my one guard? 'I wonder...'  Very well. There's only one way your family can save you. YOU must defeat ME in Dungeons, Dungeons, and More Dungeons: REAL LIFE EDITION!" Summoning two little ogres in his old man hands, Probabilitor shrinks me, and the others as well, down and into the hands of our siblings.

"Heck! I'm tiny..." I gnaw on my ankle, feeling itchy.

"Your characters...vs mine!" He grins evilly.

Ford freaks out about his ears and Dipper about his tunic. "There better be something protective under this tunic!" He turns around and lifts his skirt, "Oh no there isn't!" And since I'm ground level, yes, I could have told him there wasn't anything protective... 'But in reality, I couldn't because no one can understand me...yaaay...'

"Seriously, can't we just, like, arm wrestle or something?" Stan's voice booms overhead.

"Come on, this game is a lot of fun. I had my mom pack me a lunch." Changing his attitude completely, Prob holds up a lunch bag but then complains about the apple slices.

"Hey! I want some food!" I cry, but the only sound that comes out is a growl.

"What's up, Mace, you okay?" Dipper kneels down and puts a hand on my head.

Luckily, my breathing is on point, must be something about the dragon body, but I'm not complaining! 'How do I let him know I'm okay?'  I wrack my brain for good ideas.

"Yes!" I say, chipper, and thankfully it comes out as an excited bark like noise. Dipper smiles, breathes a sigh of relief, then pats me on the head before getting back up.

By now, we're already on the game board and I assume they've discussed the rules.

"But if I win, I eat their brains," the wizard finalizes.

"Hey, I'm not sure this is such a good-" Dipper starts...

"DEAL!" -but gets cut off by our gambling uncle.

"Oh boy...," my brother sighs.

Suddenly, an ogre tries to hammer us so we start running. The boys scream and I try to flap my wings to fly. 'Why. Don't. They. WORK!?' I only get, like, a foot off the ground before tumbling on my two front paws.

"What do we do? What are our moves?!" cries Stan. Mabel looks on worriedly.

"There are no moves, you make them up!" our brunette says, out of breath because he's still running.

Taken aback, I can tell by his voice, Stan yells back, "What? Really?!"

"Yes! I tried to tell you: this game involves math, but also risk, and imagination!" Ford explains. 'Man, I wish I could say SOMETHING!'

All of a sudden, since I'm not looking where I'm going, I run into the backs of my allies with an 'oomph'. I look up to see that they're hiding behind the shield of shielding! "Right on!" I yip happily, just before Probabilitor reverses the shield.