Loved or Unloved?

CHAPTER ONE: A Brand New Start

People have always told me to never look back at the past, to live the present and to await the future with open arms. This is something I can never do because my painful past just keeps coming back to me every single day. Staring at my father's tombstone, I remember the horror I felt when I came home from school and found out about my father's death. At that time, I felt fear, sadness, weariness and above all, I felt empty inside. Back then, I would cry myself to sleep. Sometimes, I still do because I can’t and I won’t accept his death although it has already been one year. The painful ache I feel in my heart makes my father’s death feel like it was just yesterday.

Thinking back, I realized so much has happened since my father died. Just less than a week ago, my mother, Cassandra Meyers has gotten remarried and is now Cassandra Jones. Trust me when I say I had no say in this marriage at all. We now live with the Jones. Gerald, my step-father, is a pretty nice guy. He tries to include me into the family as much as possible but his daughter, Anna Jones, is a whole different matter.

“I’ll never accept you as my sister. You and your mother are just a pair of gold-diggers,” she spat to me on the day of the wedding and ever since then, we have never talked. To be honest, I don’t blame her for thinking that way because the marriage was so sudden and my mother was in a pile of debt. I confronted my mother that night and asked her if the marriage was just to pay off our debts, but she shook her head vigorously and was mad I even thought about that. Then I asked her how, why and when it happened.

How? “We met at work.”

Why? “Because we fell in love,” she answered, as though it was the most normal thing to suddenly fall in love.

When? “A few months after David died, sweetie.” Then I found out, on the nights I stayed up waiting for her to come back from ‘work’, she was actually out with Gerald. Yes, I was outraged at first, but there was nothing I could do.

Realizing I would be late for the first day at my new school, I brushed the dirt of my father’s tombstone. “Bye, daddy,” I whispered and then quickly walked away from my father’s grave and got into the black Volvo Gerald had bought me so I could drive myself to school. Once I backed out of the cemetery parking lot, I turned on the built-in GPS and keyed in ‘Richmond High’. I followed the GPS to school while mentally preparing myself for my first day of school.

I tried to convince Gerald to let me go back to my old school but he wouldn’t budge because he said Richmond High’s teachers were all very qualified and the education system there is much better than any public school. After flipping through the brochures, I found out that Richmond High is a very prestigious private school and a very expensive one at that, but Gerald can obviously afford it with his wealth.

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I KNOW THIS IS SUPER SHORT BUT THE NEXT CHAPTERS WILL GET LONGER. :)