𝐒𝐌𝐈𝐋𝐄 𝐅𝐎𝐑 𝐌𝐄 | 𝐫𝐚𝐯𝐢

xiii

i stood up, and shook the dirt in my clothes. we were very awkward but he did the same.

he suddenly coughed and we caught a glimpse of each other and i quickly said, "i should go home,"

"yeah you should, its very late already. do you want me to take you home?" he said and my heart just started beating fast.

"no, its okay. thanks." i smiled and got my bag, but he got my wrist.

"i insist. come on."he said and lead me to his car–– still holding onto my wrist like nothing happened.

i just kept quiet and looked down, when we suddenly halted and i bumped on his hard back.

i scrunched my face and touched my forehead, and to look where wonshik was looking.

he was staring at a couple sitting on a bench near a lamp post, and they were both holding hands while being all smiley.

wonshik was just standing there and i couldn't do anything but to take a look at them repeatedly.

when suddenly, the girl finally faced us, sensing that there was someone staring at them doing all lovey dovey things. wonshik suddenly gripped my wrist, making me flinch.

"wonshik.." i said while trying to escape, but he did something unexpected and was out of my mind.

he intertwined our fingers.

i just looked at him, not knowing what to do.

"im so sorry hyerin.." he said so suddenly and leaned in.

his soft lips is with mine's.

weird, but i think that our lips were just like for each other.

i know, cliché, but its real.

and i just knew.

but it was so wrong.

is he doing this because he knew the girl?

why did he suddenly kiss me infront of a couple?

why.. am i not happy?

my eyes were just staring at him, and i felt the couple walk off. 

i pushed him off, and that's when he finally opened his eyes. 

i just looked down, not wanting to get teary when faced to him.

"im sorry hyerin.. oh my god what did i just do?" he said, but i just gave him a smile.

"explain." i said, trying to let my feelings hide but still wore a smile. 

we sat again but no one said a thing, until he started.

"she.. was an ex." 

"so you kissed me to show off?" 

"no hye– i mean, im sorry hyerin."

"you know what, that's enough of an explanation. im tired. im taking the bus." i said, and got up, but he got my wrist again. he leaned his forehead while i just suppress my anger and sadness more.

–– what was wrong? he was crying. i felt hot water in my wrist he was holding, and i quickly squatted to get to his eye level.

i also held his hand that was in mine, and let him look at me.

"im not mad at you– just upset. so don't worry, i'll just get myself fresh air until i go home."

"im still sorry.. i was stupid."

"why are you even sorry wonshik?" i chuckled, "i didn't know i would be confessing like this.." 

i said what he said the last time he teased me, but this time i would be saying the truth. i looked at him and heaved a breath.

"i like you a lot, wonshik. im upset because you kissed me without even knowing why. 'did he do that because of the girl?' things like these pop in my head. so i'll gladly appreciate it if i'll have some alone time."

i said, heaving another sigh. i smiled at him and slowly removed his hand that has been holding mine for awhile, and stood up. 

i tried my best not to look back and went to the bus stop nearby. 

it was a very lonely, quiet night and ride home. 

–––

i plopped in my bed, still not getting what happened earlier off my mind.

i touched my lips and looked at the ceiling, which it made it look like i was playing the scene on the ceiling. 

i shook my head, trying to get it off my mind and decided to take a shower. 

what a long night.