Can't Remember To Forget You

Chapter 20

Surprise :)

Third update today yay.

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“I love you.” Harry whispers to me as I float back into consciousness.

I open my eyes and rub the sleep from them so I can look at the handsome man laying next to me.

“I love you too.” I whisper back. My heart is beating incredibly fast, but I needed to say it… get it over with.

I know that sounds terrible; I truly love Harry, it’s just… I’m terrified. That’s why I didn’t tell him for two weeks after he told me he loved me, and that’s why I’m still nervous to tell him.

I figured I was just being a coward by not reciprocating the words, so I needed to man up and tell him. He needs to hear it, and hopefully this will ease his tension about me not saying it back.

I love him. So why is it so hard to tell him?

A smile instantly formed on his face, reaching ear to ear. His large hands caressed my face as he planted numerous kisses on my lips, cheeks, jaw and neck.

“Avery.” He whispers breathlessly into my neck. “You make me so happy, baby. I love you so much, thank you.” Harry tells me in between kisses to my neck.

I bite my tongue and try to enjoy this moment even though it’s hard. I’ve never felt so afraid, and I keep telling myself that I’m just being silly. I love Harry more than I’ve ever loved anyone, but maybe that’s why I’m so scared. I’m terrified of losing him, or moving to fast and breaking my heart again, and I can’t have that happen.

Just let it happen, Avery. My conscience tells me. Things will be okay if you let them. Be happy, you deserve this. 

I relax a little after my mental pep talk, and begin kissing him back, threading my fingers through his hair. What is there to fear? Harry is beyond perfect, and for some reason he loves me. That’s all I need.

We kiss for a few minutes before taking a break to snuggle up together and lazily waste our Friday away. Thankfully we have the day off of school because the quarter just ended yesterday. Harry and I definitely need this day to spend some time alone together.

“I need to go do a few things. Do you mind if I leave for a few hours?” Harry asks while absentmindedly stroking my hair.

“Where do you need to go? Can I come with?”

“It’s something I have to do alone, but it’ll only take a little bit.” He responds. I’m curious for a moment, but I really don’t dwell much after that. We’ve been together as much as we possibly could without making anyone suspicious in the past few weeks, so I know he probably has things to do, and I know I could use some alone time.

“Okay. I’ll probably go over to Brynn’s. She wanted to hang out today.”

“Why don’t you just stay here until I get back?” He suggests, his hand stopping its movements in my hair. “Then we can go to Liam’s house… everyone’s hanging out there because his parents are out of town.”

“We can go later tonight. Brynn will be bummed if we don’t do something today. I’ve been blowing her off a lot lately to hang out with your friends.”

“They’re your friends too, Avery.” He says with a slight edge to his voice.

“I know,” I agree. I don’t know why I still call them ‘his’ friends. Out of habit, I suppose.

“Okay, so why can’t you just stay here and wait for me?”

“Why does it matter? Once your done doing whatever you need to do, you can pick me up and we’ll go to Liam’s together.” I compromise.

“Just fucking stay here!” He snaps and removes himself from the bed. “I won’t be long, so will you just stay here?” He adds a little more calmly.

Okay then…

“Fine.” I agree despite my confusion.

Why is he acting like this? He has been becoming increasingly more and more controlling in the past weeks, and I’m choosing it to blame it on the fact that he’s new to this whole relationship thing.

“Thank you.” He mutters and runs his hands through his hair. He walks over to wear he discarded his jeans before we went to bed and pulls them on, then he walks over to the bed where I am still sitting on.

“Kiss me goodbye.”

I oblige and sit up on my knees to reach his mouth. His kiss is demanding yet sweet; controlling yet passionate.

“I love you,” He whispers and rests his forehead against mine while he waits for me to say it back.

“I love you too, Harry.”

He smiles in response and kisses me one last time before leaving the room.

Wow. That was an… interesting way to start my morning.