Victoria's P.O.V
I am going to flip my shit. Seriously.
Iris got a new lizard. She didn't name it Squirt two or some shit like I thought she would. Apparently she thought "We should mourn him, not replace him. This lizard is an addition to the family, and we want him to feel like so." God, kill me.
I want to punt that stupid thing.
She is playing relationship chicken, and I'm starting to get sick of it. She's like a crazy cat lady, but with lizards.
Seriously. She won't text Felix, or even acknowledge his name in conversation.
And it's not like I think he's perfect. He just seems cool, and he makes her happy. And, as much as Iris won't admit it, she is completely oblivious to any advances guys make. Like, Phil from her work. He asks her out, she says yes thinking it's a friendship thing, and when they get back, she had a great time and that poor sap is so drained of life.
I heard giggles from her room, and it's time that I find out about this boyfriend she had that messed her up that much.
I knocked on the door, opening it to see Tootles (the stupid lizard) crawling on her stomach as she was in hysterics.
"Hey, can we talk?" I asked.
"That is how conversations work." She said as she sat upright, snatching Tootles up and placing him gently down in his cage.
"No, I mean.. Like the serious talk we had last time."
"Oh. Oh. Okay." She said, sitting down gently on her bed, tucking her legs under herself.
She gestured for me to sit down, and I did.
"Trouble with Ryan?" She asked and I shook my head.
"No. I want you to tell me about your ex-boyfriend." Her gaze focused on the comforter that was clenched in her fist, but she gave a slight nod.
"Okay.. We started dating in our freshmen year of high school. His name is Elliot Phares. He was more popular than me, but wasn't arrogant about it. I was actually the spazz that no one wanted to be friends with, but I didn't mind. Nobody understood us, but we worked. I thought I loved him. Eight years later, and I find this.. Ring." She gets choked up, and I place my arm on her shoulder. I see her visibly relax, but she still doesn't meet my eye.
"I decided in the course of time that I found the ring that this wasn't what I wanted. I mean.. I didn't want to be alone. But I had good reason.. Who would be with me? I'm just the spazzy girl from high school that still hadn't developed into a mature person. Physically and mentally. I push away love, because I worry that an unfulfilled would be worse than loneliness.
"When he proposed, I made up my mind that it wasn't right. I knew he was settling for me.. I don't know how.. I just did.
"But, I moved my stuff into my friends apartment. I realized that Florida was also wrong, so I moved here because this is where my parents were relocated when I graduated my senior year in high school. And.. The rest you know." She finally met my eyes. Her gorgeous hazel eyes were rimmed red, and tears glistened on them.
"Were you ever in love with him?" I asked. She shrugged.
"I don't think so. It didn't feel like it. But, then again, I don't know what love feels like."
She tried to get off the bed, but I grabbed her wrist.
"We're not done. You need to stop this." Her eyebrows furrowed, and I could tell that she was agitated.
"Stop what?"
"Keeping everyone at arms length. It's not healthy. You need to call or text Felix or something because you like him, and he likes you. I know you aren't really that mad, but you need to work through these commitment issues you have. Just because Elliot wasn't right, doesn't mean that Felix will be. You have to try. If you want to love, go find it yourself. Fuck the heart. Find your own love."
She gave me a half smile and turned away.
"I'll try. But.. If it doesn't work out, don't pester me."
"You know I can't promise that." I said and she groaned.
