I felt like a new man after feasting on the exquisite cuisine that is Taco Bell. My taste buds and digestive system were utterly enthralled. After gulping down a Burrito in Spanish, I suddenly realized something else.
What if this baby I'm carrying isn't mine?
Bolts of horror shot through my awesome body. Sofia had betrayed me, destroying my life and creating a dark secret that will always haunt me, and which could send Sofia to jail forever and ever. Even though she is a bitch and I hate her, I still don't want her to rot in jail so I decided not to tell anyone about Stefano's untimely and mysterious demise. I had come home to my Italian villa after a long hard day of sailing in the Specific Ocean to find Stefano dead in the house. I panicked. I screamed, I tried CPR. But to no avail.
Poor Stefano had already expired. Crossed over to the other side. Kicked the bucket. Bought the farm. Gone to the great big Italy in the sky.
My horrified screams awoke Sofia, who rushed out from the bedroom to the living room in her lingerie. I admit, I momentarily forgot about the gory scene of death in our living room and rushed to kiss her. She was so fucking hot.
"Sofi" I breathed, as I got closer. I could smell her coconut shampoo and see the smooth richness of her naturally red lips. I inched closer and closer, until I heard someone else enter the living room.
Since Sofia and I were not moving, I deduced that it was someone who was not Sofia or me. To my surprise, I found my twin brother, my own flesh and blood, standing there wearing nothing but a bed sheet.
The horror! The betrayal! The chaos! The fracas! The ensalada!
"Adrian?" I choked out. "What are you doing here?"
Adrian awkwardly fidgeted with the bed sheet, moving it to a more strategic location.
"I was uhh... here to change your sheets since your maid didn't show up today."
I let out a sign of relief. How very nice of him! And here I was, suspecting them of having an affair. Everything was ok. Well except it wasn't since Stefano's cold body was right there.
Sofia suddenly began to cry. "Ok I was cheating on you! You're such a dumbass and I needed a real man for a change!"
I felt lightheaded, I could not believe the words coming out of my sweet Sofi's mouth. I, a dumbass? That just wasn't possible. Besides, I am also quite a real man. I barbecue, scream out the John Cena theme song from time to time, and have never in my whole life left a toilet seat down. Adrian has probably brainwashed her to think negative thoughts about me. What an absolute twat. Crushed by the news and by Stefano's sudden death, I changed as a person. I was never the same again after....The Incident.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
"Adam? Sir? Adam?" I came back to the present as Apple clapped her hands in front of my face. I get so carried away whenever I think about The Incident.
Apple and I were walking back to the gala, after my mother called me and demanded that I return immediately. Apparently it was some big deal, with Hobbes being arrested or something like that.
On our walk back, we stopped once so I could puke in Swedish into a public trash can.
"Is he drunk?" Asked a lady who was passing by us.
Apple was silent.
"Actually I'm pre..." I couldn't finish my sentence because Apple grabbed onto my arm and hurried on.
"Come on Adam, we have no time to waste, your mother is waiting." Said Apple. She tried to buy me a bottle of water from 7-11 but I had to turn her down. My future son Adam Jr. or future daughter Prismbeam Violette Ashlynne Peyton Carnival Moonshadow Icicyle will certainly not be drinking peasant water. Throughout my pregnancy, I shall only drink organic, cage free, grass fed water. Parenting is really all about sacrifice.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
"There you are!" Cried Mommy as she saw me. Immediately, I ran to her and gave her a big hug. She's always been there for me, and always says I'm special. Not to my face but mostly to other people.
"And you must be Apple!" She added, beaming at my new girlfriend who was wearing diamonds that were nowhere near as stunning as she was.
"Nice to meet you ma'am!"
"You can call me Elizabeth!" She said, trying to hug Apple but then recoiling because the diamonds stabbed into her skin.
"What's up with Hobbes?" I asked. I was curious. Yeah the dude was evil but I'm not sure what he could have possibly done to get himself arrested.
My mother's expression darkened. "Adam, why did you hire him as your Vice President?"
"He asked nicely. Also none of the other people who applied for the job showed up on the interview date, which was really weird. Maybe all 50 of them caught the flu, I don't know but Hobbes was the only one who showed up."
Mommy sighed and pressed her hands against her temples. "Well Hobbes has his own agenda apparently. And he is not who he says he is."
The cops brought over Hobbes, who was handcuffed.
"Hobbes, tell Adam what got you arrested." Said Mom.
Hobbes hung his head in shame. "I tried to poison you and take over your company."
I was shooketh to the coreth.
"Hobbes, tell Adam what your first name is." Said my mom.
"It's Andrew." He replied.
Andrew? That's weird. I never asked Hobbes for his first name, but I always assumed it was Calvin or something like that.
"What else do you have to say to Adam, Hobbes" said Mom.
Hobbes looked directly into my stunning orbs.
"Adam, I am your father."
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
YOU ARE READING
The Billionaire's Billionaire ✔️
HumorAdam is a billionaire, but he is also secretly a billionaire. Did I mention he's a billionaire? Also he's hiding a dark secret. And then there's Kiera Renesmee Jermagesty McKenna Ricardo Rosa de la Montoya Ramirez, a broke waitress who struggles t...