After breakfast, I hop in my shower which sprays fresh spring water infused with vitamins and protein. It's one of my many secrets to looking like a sexbomb 24/7.
I let my tears fall, mixing in with the luxury water as I remembered the events of the past few weeks. I sobbed in broken Turkish as I thought about her, the one that mattered to me the most. She betrayed me, backstabbed me, deceived me, abandoned me, and I'm running out of synonyms so I'll just stop there.
My eyes were so blinded by my tears that I accidentally squirted shampoo in my eye. I screech for Chester to help me.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------I put on a custom made $69,000 suit and then crawl back into bed. Life seems hopeless without her. I order Chester to bring me another pint of Ben and Jerrys, and I scarf it down while watching Friends.
Chester stares at me for a moment.
"Sir, you are a billionaire CEO of one of the largest North American business firms in the world."
"Yes, I am aware." Why does Chester have to talk to me like I'm an idiot? Obviously I know who I am.
"Well sir.... don't you have... work to do? When was the last time you went to work?"
"Chester, Chester, Chester," I say, shaking my head. "I'm a billionaire, obviously I have loads of free time to do things." I finish inhaling the last bit of ice cream.
"This ice cream. I like it. ANOTHER!" I yell powerfully as I smash the empty carton on the marble floor. Silently, Chester reaches into the mini fridge next to my bed and hands me another pint.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------It's around 2 pm when I wake up from my scheduled 6th nap of the day. I open my eyes to find Chester in the chair next to my bed, also sleeping. I have ordered Chester to be close when I sleep, because I've heard that 1/8 people die in their sleep and if Chester is sleeping near me, then the probability of me dying decreases by half since now there's 2 people in the room, so he could be the 1/8 person instead of me. Chester is too simpleminded to understand my superior mathematic skills, so he gave up trying to question my method of protecting myself from death.
Suddenly, one out of my 20 iPhones rang. Chester sprang awake and answered it. He sounded like he was scared shitless. There could only be one person at the end of the line- my mother. I frantically mime at him in Cantonese to tell her that I'm asleep, and thankfully she doesn't ask him to wake me.
"That was your mother," I hear him say after hanging up.
"Sir you can wake up, I hung up."
"Oh ok just making sure. So what does she want?"
"She wants you to go to your New York City penthouse for a while, to supervise the new tower for your company."
Of course, how could I forget about the tower. My mother was the CEO of my company before me, but she wanted to retire so she put me in charge of her company. I think this was a great idea, since I am highly intelligent and educated. I may be only 28 years old, but I know I am well prepared to handle a multi billion dollar company employing thousands of people. A lot people may think it's unrealistic for a man in his late twenties/ early thirties to be a billionaire but those people are full of shit.
Chester carries me to my private jet, and we fly to New York City. I lounged in my chair, clad in fluffy green socks and sipping the tears of environmental activists from my champagne flute.
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YOU ARE READING
The Billionaire's Billionaire ✔️
HumorAdam is a billionaire, but he is also secretly a billionaire. Did I mention he's a billionaire? Also he's hiding a dark secret. And then there's Kiera Renesmee Jermagesty McKenna Ricardo Rosa de la Montoya Ramirez, a broke waitress who struggles t...