Glitch | 김 석진

Five

Taehyung took a deep breath and straightened his suit jacket. Looking at himself in the mirror was strange this way. He never used to stand around admiring himself all the time. Well, he did, but he didn't. An abundance of memories flowed through his mind. Had the memory of growing up in the orphanage, but he also remembered an abusive father. He remembered meeting Victoria and instantly liking her as kids, but also meeting her as an adult when a handsome man who was his friend—he thought, perhaps—didn't want her around. He remembered kissing her for the first time against his car when they were teenagers, but he couldn't forget the memory of seeing that same man kiss her.

It was as if there were two realities happening at the same time. He couldn't remember specific details, but he could picture everything. Maybe, he thought, maybe inside the mirror he could access a different reality. One where he wasn't locked up in prison or addicted to blow.

He stared at his face caked with makeup, wondering if he could just walk through to the other side. He took a few steps forward before reaching his hand out. It inched closer to the glass, his heart rate increasing with the decrease of the gap between him and this potential portal.

"Taehyung?"

Victoria's voice gave him a start, but he only turned around quickly to meet her concerned eyes. "Noona—"

"What are you doing?" she asked quietly, placing her hand on his arm and giving it a squeeze. She could feel him shaking in her grip. It was the withdrawal, she knew it, but it still worried her. "Are you doing okay?"

Her voice was soft and solid where Taehyung felt like he was rocking on a boat. He found himself bowing his head to rest on her shoulder as he sunk into her. "I'm glad you're here."

She sighed and wrapped her arms around his shoulders while stroking the back of his head as she always did. "You're doing so well, baby. We have a program lined up for next week...just hang on until then."

Taehyung only held her tighter as a response. He was a weak man, but Victoria held him up—she always had. If he didn't have her, he had nothing. But he knew that in another time he had others too.

However, he could only focus on where he was at the present moment. And all he could ask himself was,

Would Victoria have nothing without him, too?

-

The crowds below their balcony screamed and shouted as they entered the theater. Taehyung and Victoria waved and bowed and smiled—whatever looked the most professional. It didn't take long for everyone to settle down as the movie started. Or maybe it did. Taehyung was too bugged out to notice.

His foot tapped furiously on the ground as he bit his nails. The theater had darkened while movie started. He always loved to see the final product, but he needed something—anything to take the edge off. He hadn't had any substance in days because he loved Victoria so much. But it was just shy of enough.

Taehyung's hand slowly moved up her thigh next to him. He felt her tense, but leaned in to whisper in her ear anyway. "Meet me in the bathroom in five."

"Taehyung!" she whispered, pulling him back by his tie before he could leave. "What do you think you're doing? We're in public!"

"I need you, baby. I'm so..." He trailed off into a frustrated sigh. "You know I need this more now that I'm clean."

She softened, reaching a hand up to smooth his hair back. "I know, baby. But can't you wait a few hours? It would look bad if fansites saw us leaving together."

He pinched the bridge of his nose before making a quick decision. "Then let me take care of this really quick."

"You mean—" She stopped when he gave her that look. The heartbreaking look that always made her give in. The look that said: don't you trust me? "Okay."