For what it's worth || Sope

discharge

||yoongi||

"Yoongi, sweetheart?"

I felt my heart ache at the soft, familiar voice.

"I heard you've gotten into another scuff today.. can we talk about it?"

I felt her presence as the room suddenly lit up with her sincere smile filled secretly with worry.

She came and sat close to me, her arm finding comfort around my shoulder.

"He won't leave me alone."

I said, holding the tears back to the thought of all the harsh words the cruel people said to me, but mostly aiming my remark at one particular person.

"I know you feel like they won't stop unless you act physically, but yoongi I know you see what your father does. I know you know what's going on with me and him. Is that really what you want for your youth? He started in later ages, and he's this bad. Think about what you would become starting so young."

I suddenly despised her truthful words.

I suddenly despised my father.

I suddenly despised me.

And with that I was gone, sprinting down the cold, dark, lonely streets.

And once I felt my knees buckle, simultaneously, the loud shot rang out through Daegu.

Yoongi was rudely awakened by bright, annoying lights. He recalled where he had been before now.

He opened his eyes, expecting to see Taehyung, Namjoon, and Hobi.

He slowly awakened, and suddenly white filled his sight. He looked around and spotted the machinery his arm was hooked up to.

The medicine pumped through his veins, and he already felt all of his potentially calm and happy self drain away.

Anger silently took through the same entrance as the medicine and he knew what had happened.

"Lying skanks."

He said to himself, not knowing if anyone was in the room or not.

His ribs still burned from pain of over usage. He had moved quite a bit in that small amount of time of his self made discharge.

He allowed his eyes to wander the room as his different brain parts consulted about the different curse words he'd use against joon, Tae, and Hobi, while the other parts of his brain plotted their escape plan.

After a few moments, someone opened the sliding door to the bathroom of the hospital room.

"Oh, duck. You're awake. Uhhhhhh.."

Yoongi didn't realize how much anger he showed, but Taehyung suddenly began to lower his head and allow his body to start coming together like a startled turtle.

Tae shuffled over to a chair in the corner of the room, under the tv yoongi recognized.

He swallowed down all the harsh words he wanted to say.

He felt dead.

He opened his mouth and Tae flinched.

Suddenly yoongi just went limp. Careless.

He obviously wasn't dead, he just didn't care anymore.

Taehyung felt sympathy for yoongi, he wanted him to be able to leave.

"I know you hate me, yoongi. I wish I could get you out of here, I wish your first impression of me wasn't some guy who just helped keep you captive."

He paused, looked at yoongi to see if he needed to speak. He wanted to, but he didn't.

"I know you won't ever see me as someone who wanted you safe. I don't want to be the bad guy, but if that's what it takes for you to heal than.."

He leaned back in the chair, becoming more comfortable as he ruffled his own hair.

"..so be it."

Yoongi felt shivers run down his spine.

Being wrong, confronted, and touched by people were his biggest pet peeves.
His social phobia and schizophrenic behavior made him have difficulties with these things.

Taehyung noted that yoongi wasn't ready to speak, so he let him sit in silence.

Taehyung pulled out his phone and began shifting through different apps. He plugged his earbuds in and only put one in his ear, that way he could hear if yoongi moved or did anything.

Yoongi shifted slightly, and grabbed his phone off the nightstand next to the bed. He opened his phone and pulled up a playlist of songs he often found himself listening to.

A quiet guitar noise suddenly filled the room, and Tae looked up at yoongi, who was now laying like a dead starfish, staring at the ceiling.

Yoongi's phone as set on a calming volume. Tae listened to his own music in one ear, and yoongi's in the other.

The song began with the lyrics; "will you end my pain, will you take my life, will you bleed me out, will you hang me out to dry"

Tae cringed at the words. He secretly shut off his own music and slyly pulled out his earbud to listen.

Tae and yoongi stayed like that for a while. They ended up speaking about a few of the songs and how they shared interest in a few of them.

Their "jam session" was interrupted by a knock on the door. Tae checked the time and sighed. The door opened and Hobi entered. He listened to the depressing music and raised an eyebrow at Tae.

Yoongi mouthed the words to the new song called "just add water" as he played around on his phone.

Tae grabbed his stuff and waved yoongi goodbye. Yoongi waved back.

Tae exited the room and with that, Hobi set up to stay the night.

Yoongi grimaced at the boy and then looked back to his phone.

Hobi laid down on his make shift bed, and relaxed. The music made him a bit annoyed, he wasn't into this type of music, but he dealt with it.

For weeks the cycle of Namjoon, Taehyung, and Hoseok went on and on, and in those weeks yoongi talked less and less. Finally after 6 weeks with the same old cycle, yoongi was discharged legitimately.

He packed his stuff, and Tae had been the one on watch this time.

Tae and him drove to yoongi's apartment, then unloaded. Tae offered to help settle yoongi in, but yoongi declined.

Yoongi was in no physical pain anymore. But the balance was off.

He now felt sad.

He felt himself sinking and catching up the some of his worst levels.

Once he had gotten everything put away in his home, he ignored his stomach and went straight to his dark, quiet room.

Compared to his seemingly dark living room, his bedroom was hell to someone who disliked darkness.

He sat on his bed and pulled his songbook into his lap. He clicked a pen and began writing.

"Hold your breath
While you watch me fall
It's easier to
Say nothing at all
I need a friend
Playing pretend's not working
These pills are useless
And the shadows keep lurking"