Thankful for Life's Many Blessings ✔

008

Letters to my selfish ex-babysitter, Koleta

Dear Koleta,

do you remember me? I know you probably won't, so I just wanted to make sure that I'm not just one of the "kiddos" you were basically forced to watch over for only five dollars per hour. Also, don’t you think I forgot that you left me unguarded for three hours and a half just because you couldn’t turn down the movies with your friends, or that you weren’t there when I broke my leg after I fell from a tree when I was nine!

Seriously, what can I expect from a greedy woman like you? You don't even seem to know what feelings are supposed to be because you're so attached to money.

Every time you had to babysit me or any other kid or teenager in town, you never showed any signs of enthusiasm. You were always sighing, yawning, groaning or trying hard to look away. Seriously, why would you do that? This is proof that you lack sensibility.

Okay, I know you're going to judge me for that, it's basically a habit of yours. But you can't tell me I didn't tell you, since I've pointed that out several times. The fault is all yours, then, because you didn't listen to me.

Remember that feelings are crucial to be good people. Or, at least, people with a little humanity. I mean, what's the price you have to pay for being a little more meaningful? I've always thought you're shallow, all because you can't show your feelings.

Life is good because of emotions. If you can't deal with them, then I advise that you stop being in touch with people and just lock yourself in your house, and that's it. But you won't do so, since you're nosy and tend to get on people's nerves because of your behavior. So, stop it. You're not doing any good to yourself or other people with that.

So, remember that, if you want to be accepted into society, you have to consider showing your feelings and not be afraid of being so.

Yours sincerely,
Brogan

***

Dear Brogan,

are you actually attacking me via letter because of my supposed attachment to money or what? What's the aim of all this shit? I know you never liked me, so just be honest and tell me what you think of me without playing all those games.

It's known that you dislike me, so you don't need to hide that. That would not be very honest of you. Plus, every time I came to babysit you, you were never paying attention to me. You were always busy saying shit about me "not being nice enough to you" and eating trash food all the time, leaving vegetables on your plate every single evening, with me having to eat them for you so that your parents would pretend that you were a good girl.

Well, the truth is, you're not a good girl, but just a rancorous bitch. So, stop playing a role that doesn't fit you. It doesn't make sense, it just makes you look bad. You're not a superwoman, and you can't fix your own mistakes for your sake.

I know you won't even pay attention to my words. I remember perfectly when you were sixteen and I wanted to ask you for advice, but you utterly ignored me because you were "too good to deal with a bitter bitch like me." I understood perfectly and therefore stopped bothering you. Still, I felt disappointed that I couldn't do anything to change your opinion of me.

You're really stubborn, too stubborn for my liking. And, let me tell you, even a little arrogant. You're always expecting that everyone recognizes your merits and doesn't point your flaws out. Well, you're one of the most flawed people I've ever met. I've never seen a young woman make so many mistakes all at once. You act superior, you don't respect your friends, you shut people up when they're voicing their opinion and, most importantly, you're as bitchy as hell.

Remember, though, that karma is a bitch and it's going to slap your face so hard that you're probably going to cry. Let me tell you, I'm so disappointed in you.

I hope you'll grow up after reading these words.

Yours (not so) sincerely,
Koleta

***

Dear Koleta,

I know you're angry and disappointed in me, but this doesn't mean that you have to show such a lack of respect. Saying that karma is a bitch is just proof that you're unable to show emotions and feelings and that the cold, bitter bitch is actually you. So, you shouldn't wonder why no-one wanted you as a babysitter anymore and you had to resort to another dead-end job at a pub.

The point is, I hated you because you were verbally and psychologically violent. Cursing and threatening me was what made you recognizable. You never had any nice words for me. Seriously, I've never heard of you poorly treating other kids, so you must've held a grudge on me all this time. But why? I can't understand, seriously. (Okay, why am I repeating this word?)

You don't like kids. You've never even liked kids in your life. So, why did you work as a babysitter other than money? Why can't you just admit that you're greedy and just accepted to watch kids to buy some new clothes every other week? Or are you just a coward who doesn't want to accept things as they are?

The one who should be disappointed is me. I thought your indifference was just a way to conceal your struggles, your fears, your hopes. No, you're made that way, and you're not going to change. Or, at least, that is what I think. Moreover, I'd be quite skeptical if you changed overnight.

So, stop lying to yourself and to the people around you. If you don't want any contact with people, you're not forced to stay around them. Just lock yourself in a room, and that's it. Unfortunately, though, this is not how life works. You have to face trouble, otherwise how can you become a stronger woman? You don't need to do such proclaims to prove you're strong, you have to actually show that with actions.

I really hope my words will make you think of the current situation, as well as your choices. Unlike you, I do believe there's a little hope for everyone, but I don't know if you'll ever listen to me. Never mind. At least, I tried, and I can say I'm not very proud of what I did. Almost no-one follows my advice, after all.

Take care, and try to smile once in your life.

Yours sincerely,
Brogan

P.S.: Oh, you sometimes do show a feeling. It's called resentment, and it's a very negative one. Just get rid of it.