It's the song over which I danced, sang and drunk. It's the song over which I cried because I felt like the person who was singing it, knew everything about my life. About me.
I remember every single second of when I first heard it. How I felt because of the lyrics and the voice.
Struggling against it not to fail, not to give up, not to disappear.
Struggling against all the truth it says and the sad reality it shows.
I feel the tears coming out again, as the first time I heard those few words. I feel the tears running down my cheeks at the same time the song hits my heart.
That same song that seems so different to my ears.
The song slowly ends up on a high note and I turn to Shawn. The boy who's making me cry, the boy who can read me.
"I hate you," I say and walk to the window.
"Alyssa..." He comes to me and takes my hand but I get away from his embrace.
"No... Shawn... This song can set me free as it can hold me back. It can keep me strong as it can punch me with all the truth that's in it. This song is me. These lyrics are my life, the sad reality is put into words and it just punches me like a huge wave that can make me drown under the cold water. I don't know what you went through to build up this song but I can relate to it as if it was made for me. That night you played your song, I hated you. I didn't know it was you but I hated the singer because I was struggling so hard not to give up, not to fail but I was just drinking over and over again. I hated you because you hit me with this truth..." I say, trying not to meet his look and traveling the room with my eyes. I want to stay focused but I can't stop crying. " And it's probably a new version because there are some lyrics you changed and stuff but, Shawn,-" I want to continue but he cuts me off.
"Look at me" He softly says and moves to reach me.
I bite the inside of my cheek, trying to hold back my tears but I cannot look him in the eyes.
I'm too vulnerable.
"Your song is unbelievably and definitely perfect." I finally say after a while and looking straight into his eyes.
"I changed some lyrics after I got to know you better... after I felt your pain... After you showed me how you didn't give up with your mom..." He says while getting closer.
The only thing I notice is his breath tickling my skin. His sweet and manly perfume.
Getting lost in his eyes, as always. Getting trapped in his gaze that burns my skin. Getting lost in the way he gets closer.
He slowly raises up one of his hands to my right cheek.
Small, prickly goosebumps broke out across my neck and stomach, sending a small, cold shiver through me.
A pleasant cold shiver that makes me close my eyes to enjoy this moment.
We shouldn't.
We can't.
His lips are dangerously approaching mine and I already feel the butterflies and my jerky breathing.
I hesitate a moment but quickly raise my hand, in turn, to pull him away.
"We can't," I say and walk away, out of breath. "we made up our friendship's limits, we have to respect them," I say and run my hands through my hair, still confused.
"Actually, we didn't" I look at him, frowning. "You said that we needed limits but we didn't make them up."
"Well, friends don't fall in love with each other, they don't kiss, they don't hook up. Now there are limits." I pack my things and start getting out, completely lost. "See you at the agency."
"Alyssa! Wait!" He shouts from the living room but I get out of his condo and run to my car.
You're messing up Alyssa.
You're not going to end up well from this, Alyssa.
No one is going to end up well from this.
I drive away until I reach the agency and run to Mayer's office without saying hello to Rosalie because I'm already late.
I knock on the door and get into the office when I hear him shouting me to enter.
"Hi, Miss Steal. Please sit." he doesn't let me the time to talk that he already brought out the papers to me. "There are the conditions and the policy of the contract and your new job. You'll have about 5 days either to sign it and be fully hired or not. For the moment, you have to go to the meeting room to start working with Shawn's team even if you're still a trainee." He says and holds me out the contract which I take while getting up.
"Thank you, I'll read it carefully and I can't wait to start working." I say with too much enthusiasm in my voice.
I smile at the contract I'm holding in my hand and get out of the room to walk directly to the room he asked me to go to.
I knock on the door to make sure not to get in as if I was the boss of this whole thing. I put the contract in my handbag before I get in the room and when I open the door I immediately recognize his manager, the photograph, some other people and him. Shawn.
"Miss Steal! We already began but you can join us" Mister Gertler tells me and I sit in the first empty seat that I spot.
Between Shawn and Josiah.
"Thank you.." I say and smile at him.
"So Shawn is coming up with a new album and we thought that we could start taking some simple photos of Shawn for the things like the promotion of his new music, the one that would be used on billboards and on the advertisings." He admits with his glasses on and a warm smile on.
I didn't know he was releasing a new album... I mean I only knew about his last song but I don't think more about this and just focus back on the meeting.
"Do you have any ideas?" Someone I don't know asks and catches me off guard but I quickly think of some ideas that could be great.
I didn't prepare anything but I gotta find something.
I straighten my body and I go forward to put my hands on the big table that takes the whole room.
"Well, if it's for the ads and stuff like that, I think that something simple, not extravagant would be best to avoid the information overhang," I say, looking up to catch some reactions from anyone but they're all frowning except one person.
Josiah.
"Something in dark tones?" He asks, moving forward as well.
"Not exactly... we could use the colors like grey and black but I think that it'd be better if we play with the lights and shadows." I first say but none of them reacts, not even Shawn. So I try to add something, not to flop. "Except if you want it to be related to the album's cover theme."
"I don't know yet how I want it to look like so there's no limit." Shawn cuts me off which makes me smile at him to thank him for giving me an answer.
"I think that we could try and see what you and Josiah come up with," Andrew says and the woman next to him takes the speech in turn.
"The first photo shoot is planned in 2 days and we'll need different photos with different outfits and style to make sure that at least some will be appropriate but Josiah knows what's good for Shawn's look." The woman seems to be the one who directs the crew and to keep everything appropriate even though Andrew makes the main decisions, I guess.
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Hi everyone! I hope you liked this chapter as I loved writing it! keep telling me what do you think about it!
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Drowning / SM
Fanfiction{COMPLETE} Alyssa went to the Starbucks near her home as every day to do her job as a waitress and that's where she meets a couple. The Shawn Mendes and his hateful girlfriend. She already hated them before knowing them and they did the same. Shawn...
