«did you think you can escape these barlines?»
※
twinkle twinkle little star,
how my heart is black as tar.
up above the world so high,
all my sorrows sit and lie.
twinkle twinkle little star,
how i wonder who he is.
︴
The First Hidden Colour
“just because he doesn't show it, doesn't mean it doesn't exist.”
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Hikaru's POV
An empty shell, something that was abandoned, left hollow and meaningless. It is definitely something as useless as a strand of dead hair.
I have never spoken a word about my family, not even a single bit about my past and my secrets. But all I wished, was for someone to notice all the pain and lies I kept to myself.
All the smiles and all the pain, both fused together to form a mask. That is what I was, and that is what I still am. An empty shell with a mask.
It was an early afternoon, around the time when the second years had their lunch break, I sat back on my chair, watching and listening to the teacher as others scribbled notes onto their respective notebooks.
At the same time, my eyes wandered across the room, and landed on Chiharu, who so happened to be tugging her hair behind her ears.
She sat near the center of the classroom, whereas I sat at the back right corner of the classroom.
I sighed as I observe her dilligently writing her notes, compiling them into a neat notebook.
Suddenly, her head perks up, suddenly turning around to look at me. Immediately, our eyes connected, and I found myself staring into her beautiful purple orbs. She raised an eyebrow at me, making me flinch on instinct and looked away slightly.
She giggled softly, and smiled at me, causing my heart to race against time. This was a new feeling, something that not even my family could even give me. Warmth.
Everyday, I returned home, feeling as if there was no one who thought about me. Not even Chiharu. Being the dense girl as she was, she probably did not even notice the mask I had worn.
Lunch came by in a jiffy. I walked towards her table and she pointed her finger towards the door. This was our usual everyday routine. Yuuta, Ayumi, somehow Yuri, Chiharu and I would always meet at the music room for lunch.
"So how was the first day of being a second year?" I ask, breaking the silence.
She shrugged and looked towards me. "I can't wait to leave for college," She says as she stretched her arms, loosening up the tightened muscles she had.
"Right?" I said, a little unsure about my feelings. Of course, I would not be able to enter into the school I wanted to. I was likely to either transfer overseas or enroll into a prestigious college that my parents had planned for me to enter.
Silence engulfed the air as we walked towards the music room on the second floor.
But before we could enter, she grabbed my hand and dragged me up the stairs to the roof.
