Haphazardly | leon goretzka

Forty: "I Miss You and I Need You"

The sound of a cold beer being cracked open was the only noise Leon had been hearing for the past two hours. He was sitting on a sofa in his living room, chugging drink after drink, wanting to forget everything about this day. It didn't get any better when on his fifth beer he received a text from Alyssa.

"Proud of you, baby!" The text read along with a picture of him on the pitch. He erased the message before shoving his phone back into his pocket. There was only one person he wanted to talk to in this moment, and there was no chance in hell that she would answer if he were to reach out to her; he'd burned every remnant of their bridge when he started seeing Alyssa while he was still dating Emilia in November. He had regretted many of his decisions as of late, but that one haunted him the most.

When the Bayern bound boy was about to finish his beer, the front door began jingling. Let them come in and take whatever they want. At least then there will be a different news story rather than my traitorous one, Leon thought to himself. As his door was pushed open, Max stepped into the house.

"I figured you'd be here wallowing in your own self pity," He tried making light of the situation, but Leon didn't find any humor in it honestly.

Max sauntered over to the fridge, grabbing out a beer for himself while tossing another at Leon. "I really am sorry about today, G. You didn't deserve that type of treatment. I hope you know that the guys and I are behind you one-hundred percent."

The two Schalke boys sat next to one another on the couch in silence before Leon replied, "You can deny it all you want, Max, but I do deserve the treatment they're giving me. It was the same when Manuel left Schalke. They feel betrayed, and I feel bad that I wasn't more transparent about the whole situation. I just didn't know what to do! Bayern is too good of a club to just pass up, and as much as I love Schalke, I just don't see my future there. I want bigger things; I have bigger ambitions than just getting fifth place in the Bundesliga every year."

"I understand, Leon. I've been debating if I want to sign a pre-contract with Arsenal or if I should renew my contract with Schalke. After this whole ordeal with you, I think that if I do decide to join the Gunners, I'll wait until after the season to sign a contract. You're a lot stronger than me, Le. I couldn't handle the negativity."

"It was awful, Max," Leon decided to be upfront with his best friend. "I get that they're hurt, but goddamn so am I! I don't just have the fans hating me, but you've seen what Clemens and Christian said about me too! They're riling everyone up, and I feel like I'm drowning everywhere I look!"

"Have you talked to Alyssa about it? Maybe discussing your thoughts about it would make you feel better," Max suggested, but Leon shot him an are-you-kidding-me look.

"No, I haven't."

"She's your girlfriend, Leon."

Leon pulled on his hair, stressed beyond belief. "It's not like that between us, Max. You know that."

"Then why keep her around? Why are you doing this to yourself, Leon?"

"Because I don't want to be alone! She's one person that won't leave me! Alyssa supports me no matter what!" He shouted heatedly before taking another beer out of the refrigerator.

Truthfully, Leon had thought about breaking up with the model for a while now. He didn't particularly enjoy her company, but she was quite a good fuck.

The footballer especially contemplated terminating their relationship when he thought about pursuing Emilia again, but had decided against it when he saw how happy she was. Speaking to her again would just bring back bad memories, and neither of them needed that stress in their lives right now— at least that's what Leon told himself.