I will NEVER regret murdering mal, that skank ass dipshit ho, and I also hope my accomplice, brian never rats me out.
I don't run an applesauce factory by myself, there is a co-owner named Brian and well, he helped murder the fuckwad mal. We've known eachother for a couple years now and originally met on Craigslist; with the same dream, to make applesauce.
I suggested we open up a shop and occasionally make human apple sauce because what other way is there to bond with your homeslice? There is no other way.
Brian had secretly hated mal ever since his grandpa side shot him in the leg for walking through his lawn, and threw a couple fireworks at him and blew off half of Brian's beautiful face.
Brian used to be a supermodel that worked all over the world, posing for McDonald pan flips and a couple commercials for Viagra. But, now he just sells "not dead body Apple sauce and Pirated sonic merchandise"
He seems somewhat happy, all he really does is play sonic and table tennis.
I'm glad he was the one who helped me kill mal, because he's the love of my life.
Stay tuned.
