The Arrangement

Chapter 40

Autumn

I left him , I really did it. After so many tears I finally went through with it and left him.

My heart feels as if it isn't even there anymore but my tears won't stop , they just continue to flow as I sit in Sarah's car while she drives to my parents beach house. She said he won't look for me there but who's to say once we go back to school that he won't look for me.

I know Xzavier and I know what I mean to him , he never lets me forget that he cherishes me in every way possible. He won't give up until he has me but something has to be done , he has to accept that our futures are going into different paths.

I love him so much it burns me inside but I have to be strong , I have to stick to my game plan before he was even in the picture I can't let him dictate what I want to do with my life but apart of me wants him to.

He needs me right now I can feel it , when he and I were on the phone something about his voice was off. My heart keeps clenching for no reason in particular, something is really wrong. Where is he.

No think about school in London , about a new start and going through and living your childhood dream. Think of all things London.

I couldn't stop this feeling of being empty, I've never felt so alive with Xzavier I guess once I broke things off a piece of me broke away also. I wish life was simple.

We arrive to my parents beach house and I get out of the car with my duffel, she let me go home and change out clothes of course so I guess we took a while longer.

"See you later baby and hey I'm here for you Okay whenever you need me" I give her a smile and hug before going inside of the house.

It was quiet and lonely just how I felt now , I slumped upstairs into my parents room. It always soothes me when I have them but mom hasn't been discharged from
The hospital and I know Xzavier would look there.

In here I felt as if the both of them were here now but I know they can't be because of a miracle, Jacob. He's so precious and doesn't even know how good of parents he has yet, yeah they use to work a lot but seeing as a newborn is now in the household I know mom will take a leave until she's ready to go back to work.

"Ahh!" My heart clenched again, I wasn't even thinking about Xzavier. It's like we have this connection and I can feel his pain along with mine.

Please be safe Xzavier, please.
******

Xzavier

I've driven everywhere and I still haven't found her yet , it's not like she just left for the night she broke up with me and left when I needed her the most.

I'll always need her , why can't I do anything right. Why can't anything go right for me and Autumn it's always something dealing with our relationship.

Maybe she should go to London to get away from you!

My heart clenched and tears stream blur my vision , I quickly wipe them away so I could focus on the road and think of where she might be. I pull over in the side of the road and really think about the places she would go.

Kitten please come back to me!

I sulk for another ten minutes in the car , breaking down in tears as I think I've lost her forever.

Kitten please, I need you!

I call out to her in my mind , even though I know she can't hear me I continued to do it although. My heart clenched after every call I made out to her, Bringing my engine to life I don't even know where I'm going I just drive until I feel That's it's right to stop.