Do not let your hope get the best of you. Remember your truth. Remember your place. Remember what your truth must become.
You are going to lose people you never deserved to have in the first place. It sucks but you cannot feel sorrow. You deserve your life at home. No one wants to hear you, no one wants to believe you, no one cares and they shouldn't.
Just get through. Uncertainty lies ahead. Is college a possibility? Your own life? Who knows? You probably won't even make it through high school.
Take a deep breath. Take another one. You are quiet. you are obedient. you are an introvert. You do as he says when he says it and do not dream of refusal nor insubordination. You are lucky to be alive. Pain is a price you will pay and you will take it quietly and calmly and you will give him the power and control he seeks and you will wear long sleeves and long pants and shirts with closed backs and you will keep it to yourself and you will stay neat and closed because that is what needs to happen and that is what you need to do.
Take another deep breath. Now you're there. You are happy. You are perfect. You lie(d!) for no reason but you're through with that. Your family loves you and supports you and is proud. Your grades are sky high. You're one of the most fit people to run everything and you will work hard to do so. Your friendships will be superficial for now because that is what they need to be. You will make it through two years before this is truly who you are and every other self is a bad dream left in the past. Take a deep breath. You can do this. You can get through this. You have to be patient and do it right.
Words unsaid stories untold
They need to stay that way. Messy is inconvenient. You are not a mess. You will be who you need to be when you need to and you will accept disrespect and you will accept lost trust and lost friendship and lost happiness because that is what you need to do. This is not fair and you can be angry but not towards them. Life is not fair, wallow, then get over it and move on.
You can do this. You can keep it up. You can convince them. You can become the happy person that you want to be.
Go mother go mother go mother
Bark bark bark bark
Not quite milk
You will make it through.
