I don't know how to start this, I really don't.
I know eventually I'm going to go over the edge. I'm gonna break, I'm gonna snap, somethings going to push me and I'll crack right down the middle.
There are so many things I wish I could say, to you, to them. I wish I could get across how much I love you, some way that doesn't include plain old "I love you" but I can never find the right words.
I wish I could tell you how many times you've saved me from doing something stupid.
I wish I could tell you how many people are there. You're worth it, we all see it.
I wish I could show you how far you can go, how much potential you have.
I wish I could thank you for doing all the big sister things I can't.
I wish you could see how much you help, how many people you touch. Me, Olaf, Chatty, Kris, Everyone. And everyone who you're going to help.
I wish we could see how our stories end. See it and just know, accept.
I wish I could talk to you anytime.
I wish you could rescue me more often then once a week.
I just want you to be okay.
I want you to know that I love you. That I'll try my hardest not to push you away. That I'm forever in debt for all you do for Abs.
I want you to understand that I will never lose hope for you. That you have the ability to reach things no one else can do, to help people no one else can help. That you deserve the world.
I just want you to be okay.
And I want you to know that I hate you. I hate you with all my heart for being there. If you weren't, I could just leave. I wouldn't feel guilty or like I'm letting someone down, I would literally have no point.
I hate you for making me see this through. I hate that you can't always be there. I hate everything.
But I know I'll thank you later, so I might as well thank you now.
I love you, now and always, up to the moon and back and even more than that.
And yes I still am the queen of mixed signals :P
Thanks for always being there. Thanks for YOU and yourself. Thanks for changing your mind when you were that close.
Thanks
