Like Lavender (Vkook/Yoonmin/trigger warning)

십사

I'm not going through this shit.

For some reason those were the only thoughts going through Namjoon's head. That, and that he should've done something to save Taehyung. Because now this was happening to him, and he was forced to watch it. He could close his eyes and pretend it wasn't happening, but he wasn't good at pretending. He couldn't ignore him. He had to do something. Namjoon remembered reading something somewhere that said the only easy day was yesterday. He never realised how true that was until now. Yesterday, he didn't have to watch one of his closest friends get murdered. Now he did.

Well, he didn't have to watch him get murdered. Eventually, he would, but now he didn't. If he didn't do something at that exact moment, he might lose him. He knew ever since Junghyun died Taehyung hadn't been feeling good about himself. He'd been depressed for a long time. He was suicidal for a while. Even attempted to end his life only for Namjoon to drag him to the hospital and talk to him. The conversation that led after that, when Taehyung had come to, would never leave Namjoon's head, and sometimes he still randomly thought about it.

"I'm sorry, hyung." Taehyung had told him, choking back the tears he'd forgotten to cry. "I'm such a failure."

"You're not a failure." Namjoon had tried to comfort him, only for it to not work and for Taehyung to start thinking lower of himself.

"Yes I am. Look at me. I couldn't keep Junghyun alive. I can barely keep myself alive. I can't even fucking kill myself right." A single line of eye water fell down Taehyung's face. Namjoon still wished he had an answer to that. But he didn't. He just sat there in complete silence.

He hoped Taehyung was alright. Taehyung had been such a boost in everyone's happiness. Even during his depression, which Namjoon sometimes feared wasn't over, and his suicidal stage, Taehyung had always supported everyone. He was happy for everything that they did. He loved them all, and they loved him in return. Namjoon didn't know what they'd do without him. The world would be a much more dull place without Kim Taehyung there to make them smile.

Namjoon hadn't slept at all last night. He had a feeling he would sleep again that night as well. He noticed the day was nearing a closure, soon he'd have to go home. He decided he'd stop by and visit Jimin before he did went home. To see how he was getting along. He was wondering how he was supposed to tell Jimin and Yoongi what he saw them do to Taehyung when someone walked through the door and slammed a brown paper file on his desk.

"What is it?" Namjoon asked, glad to use his voice again for the first time in the day.

"There's been another murder. They're increasing day by day." The man, whom Namjoon had never actually seen before, informed him. "Boss says he heard you'd seen our guy and that he was right in front of you. He says to find him in a week or your fired."

And with that, he left the room.

Jimin didn't realise he'd fallen asleep until Yoongi shook him awake. He sleepily opened his eyes and looked up at Yoongi. The drugs hadn't worn off yet, but there was a nurse in the room unplugging him from something. She told him Yoongi had already signed him out, and that he could leave when he was ready. She left after that. Jimin sat up, rubbing at his eyes.

"Still tired?" Yoongi asked. Jimin nodded, then tried to stand up. Yoongi realised he was still wearing his clothes for some reason. He wondered why they hadn't changed him out of them, then remembered that by the time they'd gotten him here, he was probably passed out and they hadn't gotten a chance to.

He was snapped out of his thoughts when Jimin almost collapsed trying to put his shoes on. They were on, just not tied, which he didn't get a chance to do since Yoongi lifted him up into his arms. Pulling Jimin to his chest with all the strength he had, he told him to go back to sleep. They were driving home that day. Using Yoongi's warmth as a pillow, Jimin lay with his eyes open and his breathing steady as Yoongi moved to the car, slowly.

Jimin's entire body was cold, Yoongi noticed. Winter had always been Jimin's favourite month. He loved the snow, the songs, the mood, Christmas and basically everything about it. When they got in the car, Yoongi was hit with the memory of the rather amusing time Jimin had once been asked in a survey what could possibly be better than sex. Jimin had answered simply with December.

He told Yoongi later that what he meant was sitting by the fire with him, on the couch, wrapped in blankets, Yoongi's arms around him, cuddling. Hot chocolates in different coloured cups on the coffee table just in front of them. Still in their pyjamas, watching movies on a lazy Sunday afternoon. Close to each other. With Yoongi's warmth keeping him safe so long as he was held close. Never leaving him. Until eventually they'd fall asleep like that, too comfortable to go to bed, to their separate rooms. Jimin falling more and more in love with Yoongi with every breath he took. Forehead kisses, sips of hot chocolate, smooches. Jimin adored it.

And remembering it all now, Yoongi wanted nothing more than to give Jimin all that and more.