Home to Avonlea

21. too late

Coming back to the Tilderlys farm was not a good feeling for Anne.

She gazed at the farmhouse with caught breath, her soft grey eyes hesitant. She remembered leaving this place in the wagon with Gilbert, the enormous relief she felt finally going home. There was also another memory, of the night they came to Tilderlys farm. It was a dark, blurred memory drawn from her nightmarish experience bleeding out and almost slipping away.

Anne pushed herself on. When she knocked at the door it was answered by Mrs Tilderly, who looked surprised to see Anne. She ushered her in and they moved to the sunny kitchen. Another hazy memory flashed back of panicked voices and candlelight and the excruciating pain while she lay on that table.

"What can I do for you Anne?" Mrs Tilderly asked.

Anne shook herself. Stay in the present Anne.

"I need my old dress back." Said Anne. "I know it was in tatters, but it is truly important that I get it back."

"Whatever for?" Mrs Tilderly asked.

"Well, Marilla needed swatches for making a new dress. She couldn't perfectly remember the fabric and told me to recover it from you." Anne made up. "That is, if you still have it?"

Mrs Tilderly hesitated, thinking. She pushed her grey-streaked hair behind her ear. "Well, yes. I believe I do. It was going on the burn up this evening, so you're lucky you caught me in time."

Anne followed Mrs Tilderly out of the house into the back yard. By the barn was a heaped pile of old, rotten wood and broken furniture. It had grass growing on it here and there but the bloodied, tattered dress was newly added.

"This heap of junk has been piling up for a long while. My husband has been saying he'll burn it for a good many years. I put that dress on it to spur him on." She sighed. "It's not a pretty memory of that night. It was might stressful for me after not being a nurse in so long and never even being allowed to properly train. I just used to read all of my brother's books from the college he studied at and helped with the locals. I did work as a volunteer for my twenties, but it was hard to be a woman in the profession. Closed doors everywhere I turned. I just thank the Lord I had the knowledge I needed."

"Well, I am certainly grateful. You're honestly an inspiration, to persist your passion in such face of opposition. A role model for women and young girls everywhere. I owe you my life and a great deal more, I'm sure." Anne told her sincerely. "Passing this dress on back to me is a debt also. I won't ever forget your kindness."

"Well, your Marilla was a sort of role model to me growing up. She was terribly strong in the case of losing her brother and giving up her dreams of travelling and all to care for her family. It must have taken so much dedication and sacrifice. She was so brave and I needed to see somebody with that strength in those times." Mrs Tilderly said wistfully. "To help her daughter, I feel I have fulfilled the debt of gratitude I held to Marilla."

Anne knew nothing of Marilla's dreams to travel, and next to nothing of her losing a brother. She had heard things and seen pictures of Marilla and Mathew with their late brother but never dared to pry. This came as a shock that her dear Marilla experienced things such as this. She longed to ask her about them and maybe get a glimpse into her past.

"Well I'm sure Marilla would be utterly humbled at the notion of being an idol to another." Anne said emotionally.

She had been with the Cuthberts for a long time now, and she was still finding out new things.

...

Gilbert and Diana searched the woods for a long time, feeling gradually more and more hopeless of finding Thomson. The trail had eventually become almost impossible to see and Gilbert's tracking was reaching it's limit. He didn't want to tell Diana that he didn't know where they were going, as he felt that it was his responsibility to find their way. Anne had left because of him.