i'll try to save you//dan smith

XXV

TW//dan's pov
they weren't supposed to know about my eating disorder, no one was supposed to know. It's not my fault high school fucking sucked and turned me into this. Now I lay on Kyle's couch, he's asleep in his own room. I hate everything; I hate that Joy walked in on me purging, I hate that I chose to throw up instead of seeing her, I hate that she saw me like that.

She probably hates me, and to think that i wrote a song for her! She's never gonna want to talk to the boy with an eating disorder, Joy probably thinks I'm disgusting. Pretty girls like her don't purge, they can eat whatever they want and not worry about it. But then again, Joy cuts..why does she fucking cut? She's so beautiful, why would she want to hurt herself?

Should I talk to her about it? No i better not, it's not like i'll ever talk to her again. We had planned to do so much; It's such a shame that we're never going to do any of it.
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My phone suddenly vibrates after another hour of deep thinking. It's a text from Joy, she want's to meet somewhere. Can't say I was expecting this. We agree to meet at a coffee shop that we've been to before. By now, Kyle is in the kitchen making something. He doesn't mention yesterday, he knows not to mention it.

I explain that I'll be meeting Joy and he offers to drive me. Now i realize that I haven't showered in a few days and I probably look shit. So I just get an Uber, there's no time to clean myself up.
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joy's pov

I wave at Dan as he enters the coffee shop, I've already ordered our drinks. He looks tired, as always, but I probably don't look any better. Yesterday was awful and I couldn't sleep.

"How are you?" Dan asks as he sits down in the chair across from me. I quickly pull out my bag before answering him

"I'm alright, I brought your meds because your door was open and I assumed you didn't have any at Kyles" I unzip my small purse and hand him a bag of several pills. He smiles as he swallows them dry.

"Thanks for remembering, god knows I fucking wouldn't have" he says as he hands the bag back to me. By now our coffees have arrived and we thank the server.

We sip in silence for a few minutes before I stupidly speak, "So about yesterd-"

"Yeah we should probably talk about that" he interrupts. He puts down his drink and sighs, "I'm sorry I didn't tell you before. I just didn't want you to think I was a freak"

"Why would I think you were a freak? I..." I pause for a bit, I don't know if I wanna share this one thing with him; "I have an eating disorder too"

"Oh no love" Dan says, taking my hands into his. He sighs once again, "Guess this means we have to look out for each other"

"I'm okay with that"