Together Forever.

Happy little Depression

Have you ever had someone break your heart? Someone you absolutely love to pieces tell you they simply do not want you anymore? Or have someone tell you they love you then go behind your back and sleep with someone else? If you have then you can easily share my pain. If not, then welcome to my life...

I woke up. 

So surprising I had actually woken up from this, I've been sleeping for days now. The bright sunshine in my eyes and the birds chirping their happy tune. Why is the world so beautiful? I just want to be alone and wallow in my sadness. A prospect not possible with the bright blue sky and the big, yellow, shining sun saying good morning. I just had the worst breakup in my life and there is nothing i want more in this world than to sleep.

I slowly lifted myself out of bed, threw my feet onto the wood floor, and stared at my wall. I felt so numb, like my heart had been ripped out and i felt nothing anymore. I put one foot in front of the other and made the long walk down the stairs.

"Hi, Boo. How are you feeling today?" My friend Alice cheerfully skipped over to me and wrapped me up in a tight hug.

"My heart hurts so badly," I moaned, trying to choke back my tears."I feel like when I saw her name on his phone"--I paused and began to cry--"my entire world fell apart." I felt like a massive, eighteen wheeled truck had run me over, but I was still alive. There was this hole in my chest, I felt like if I were to take a big enough breath my body would break open. I wanted to know if he hurt like I did, if he cried as many tears as I did. But most of all, I wanted to know if he felt guilty about what he did. He cheated on me; he told me he loved me and then he goes and does this? He told me together forever. Apparently, forever ended sooner than I thought. Alice started quietly shushing me, slowly rubbing my back.

"Don't worry, Marie. It will all be okay." She was trying to help; I could tell she wanted to, but nothing could fix what he did to me. Nothing could ever fix the pain he had caused my heart to feel.

"Alice, it's not okay. Ethan has been cheating on me for--for almost two months," I sobbed. I pushed her away, breaking the hug, and made my way back to the stairs. 

"Where are you going, Marie?" she asked, concerned. I turned around, looking down at her with mascara stained tears streaming down my face.

"I'm going back to my bed, and I don't feel like eating." My want for food was gone; my want for anything was gone. I walked into my room, closed my depressing curtains, and crawled back into bed. I looked under my fluffy covers for my remote. I found it and clicked on my TV; the light from it bright and full of color. I hated it, I hated how everything and everybody around me was so happy as I sat here and suffered. I am feeling depressed, alone, and worthless. I feel like I have a big hole in my chest; nothing anybody can say or do will fix it. The news channel was the first one to appear on the TV. Some boy band was being interviewed. They showed a close-up of a super hot boy. He looked so happy.

"Hi, I'm Harry Styles. I'm eighteen years old and I will be hosting the new game show, 'Who Will I Date?' airing tonight at eight. Make sure to tune in." His smile was perfect. He gave me hope I would find a perfect guy someday, somehow. I pulled up my guide and recorded his show. I flipped through the channels until I found the saddest movie I could find. Just sitting there staring at my TV not really paying attention, my eyes began to wander and  landed on the picture of Ethan and me. I threw it at the wall and the glass in the frame shattered and the pieces went all over the floor. I pulled the covers over my head and started to cry. Why is this happening to me? We were about to celebrate our two-year anniversary this week and then he goes and cheats on me. He said they were just talking and were just friends, but one night when he was over I had his phone. I told him I was on Facebook, but I was really reading his messages. They had been talking for the past couple of months; I don't know how I didn't see this coming. How could he tell me he loved me then leave and go to her? Was I really just not enough for him. That's what I get for falling in love at age fifteen, I guess. I can't believe I was so stupid, but we met during a hard time in my life and he helped me through it.