Pen Beneath The Bush

Present Tense

"Present tense!" An old lady's voice echoes through the boy's dormitory. "Present tense!"

"Who's that?" Ben asks.

"Present tense!"

Will gasps. "Sounds like Mrs Wallet."

Ben shakes his head. "You mean the old caretaker?" He frowns, hovering his torch as Will frowns."Mrs Wallet is dead: it can't be her."

"And don't you boys look delicious?"

"I won't lie though Will, it does sound like Mrs Wallet."

"Talk to me..."

"Where is it coming from?" Ben asks.

Both boys examine the surroundings. Everything is dark and still apart from a gold purse flapping all over the floor. Will points to the purse. "That wallet is moving. Could it be...Mrs Wallet?"

The wallet flies into their hand. "Present tense!"

"Why do you keep saying present tense?" grumbles Will.

"Because PRESENT TENSE," cries Mrs Wallet's spirit. "Take my money."

"I don't think that' appropriate," Ben mutters.

Will opens the cabinet. "Yes, we should really be going back to bed."

"TAKE MY MONEY! PRESENT TENSE!"

Ben huffs and squeezes the wallet into the cabinet in the hope that it would silence the ghost within. "Now would you please stop saying that."

"SHOVE IT UP YOUR ARSE!" Mrs Wallet croaks. "Present tense."

"I don't get it."

"Me neither, Will. Let's go back to bed."

The cabinet explodes. A flurry of £20 notes ensures they're all awake. "ENJOY PRESENT TENSE!"

Ben and Will have no idea what just happened.

Meanwhile, Principle Ijizzin Mipants and his gang of blue-powdered monkeys brainstorm new and interesting ways to prank the students of Nipplebutt Boarding School.