i'm sorry you loved me ; samo

fifteen

summer came quickly. before momo knew it, she was a senior. she passed all of her exams with flying colors, which meant her parents would allow jeongyeon and nayeon to stay for the weekend. momo studied for hours just so they could.

the rest of the girls were going on a road trip, which had become an annual thing every summer and momo had to stay behind. she was upset that she had to miss all of the fun, but then she reminded herself that she was about to see nayeon and jeongyeon, and that made her happy.

when the first saturday of summer arrived, the girls stopped by momo's house before they went on their roadtrip and said goodbye to her. mina gave her a goodbye kiss, and dahyun dramatically told her goodbye as if momo was about to be sentenced to her death.

"i'll miss you most of all, kim dahyun." momo whispered into the younger girl's hair, going along with the shtick.

"oh, hirai momo! i'll miss you, my love." she cried. momo laughed as jihyo dragged dahyun back into her car. they began to drive away and momo went inside. nayeon and jeongyeon would be arriving in just a matter of hours.

sana, to no surprise, had decided to stay behind. momo tried not to get angry over it even though to be honest, it pissed her off to no end. this was their chance to rekindle their friendship. but if sana didn't want to try, momo wouldn't either.

"are you excited, sweetie?" momo's mother questioned, grabbing momo's shoulders and jumping up and down slightly.

momo chuckled. "i think you might be more excited than me."

her mother smiled brightly and shrugged. "i haven't seen them in so long, and you grew up with them! i feel like they're my daughters too." she said.

the doorbell rang and momo's heart dropped, and her throat closed up. she was so nervous. she walked slowly to the door. before opening it, she took a deep breath and ran her hands through her hair.

she opened the door and was immediately attacked with hugs and kisses.

"momoring!" nayeon yelled out, giving her a bear hug. jeongyeon hugged her even tighter, and momo thought she was about to pop.

"nayeoni!" momo yelled back, hugging them both.

they didn't look very different. obviously, they were a bit taller and looked much more mature, but that was it. nayeon still had her long brown locks. jeongyeon's hair was longer and darker. they let momo go and she stepped back.

"momo, you're still so pretty." nayeon whined. "your body is so perfect."

momo's face got hot as jeongyeon nodded in agreement. "i was hoping you'd get uglier for my sake." jeongyeon said.

momo dropped her jaw and punched jeongyeon's shoulder playfully. "thanks, you two look great too." she said. she invited them inside and they walked to the kitchen where momo's mother sat at the table, pretending not to be excited.

"oh, look at you two." she cooed, standing up. she moved nayeon's long hair back and put on hand on jeongyeon's cheek. "you look so well!" she said.

"mom, why do you compliment them more than you compliment me?" momo asked. her mother turned towards momo and gave her the 'look'.

momo shot her a toothless grin and then grabbed the other girls' hands, and lead them to her room. she closed the door and then attacked them with hugs again. she was on the brink of crying.

she was happy they were here. of course she was. but she wanted sana.

"how is sana?" she blurted. she stopped hugging nayeon to look at them.

jeongyeon shrugged. "good, i guess. she's the same as always."

momo nodded. she could almost hear sana's voice in her head, laced with anger as she cursed at her. she knew jeongyeon and momo knew about their fight, and she told herself she wouldn't bring it up, but she had to. she felt like a bottle of soda. that fight shook her up and now she needed to open herself up and let everything spill out.

"i can't live without her." she whispered, letting tears spill down her cheeks. she laughed softly through her tears. "i can't do this."

nayeon sat momo down, and the 2 girls sat by her sides. "give her time, momo." jeongyeon soothed. "she's still upset. she'll get over it.

momo began to cry harder. "but what if she doesn't get over it?" she sobbed.

jeongyeon clicked her tongue. "she always does. remember in seventh grade when she didnt talk to us for a week? and then afterwards she ran to us crying in the middle of the lunchroom because she missed us so much?" she asked.

momo laughed through her tears, but her laugh quickly faded away. "but that only lasted a week. we havent talked in almost 2 months."

nayeon sighed. "she's going through a lot right now. it'll just take her a long time to get over it."

momo stood up. "you dont know that she'll get over it!" she said, getting angry. "i was so mean to her, guys. she trusted me and i broke her heart." she cried.

nayeon and jeongyeon stood up with her. "we know her. you know her. we all know she'll get over it."

momo groaned, throwing her hands over her face. "just because you say it doesnt mean it's true! you guys suck at comforting me."

"what do you want us to do, momo? whenever we bring you up she changes the subject." nayeon snapped.

momo sat back down on her bed with her hands on her face, and got all of her tears out. the silence in the room lasted too long. momo lifted her head, her face wet with tears. jeongyeon squatted down in front of her and wiped the remaining tears.

"im sorry." momo whispered. "lets go outside."

nayeon and jeongyeon nodded and they all went outside. the air was warm. it was almost too perfect.

"lets not talk about this, alright?" nayeon asked. "i missed you. i dont want to spend this weekend with a sad momo."

momo grinned. "i wouldnt want to, either. lets walk around, i'll show you my town." she said, opening her arms and spinning around.

the rest of the weekend went great. they spent time outside, stayed up too late, and snuck out in the middle of the night to go to the beach.

momo spent the weekend wondering if nayeon and jeongyeon were a thing. she wondered if they had the same relationship her and sana used to have. she didnt ask because she didnt want to be rude. unlike sana, they didnt say anything about them liking girls and momo decided not to force them to say anything.

on monday morning, they all woke up early. not because they wanted to so they had extra time together, but because nayeon's parents showed up early to pick nayeon and jeongyeon up.

they stood outside momo's house holding their bags and constantly yawning. after a few remarks from their parents about not getting enough sleep, jeongyeon and nayeon climbed into the car and they were gone. and momo waved until the car was too far away to see.

momo felt great. she felt refreshed. she was ready to spend the summer with her friends. she was tired of stressing over sana.

but little did she know, this would be the worst summer of all.