Try and Trust the Princess.

Home Sweet Home

TW/ABUSE

I could not stop thinking about how Ryan must be feeling right now I just walked out and did not say anything but I could not sit anything without crying.

I am sitting on my bed right now waiting to hear my dad walk in the doors and storm his way up the stairs and do what he does.

My heart beating so fast and I am sweating for the life of me.

Tristan is not home so he must be at school right now, safe from what is going to happen to me.

I heard the front door open and slam shut.

I jumped at the sound and I started to panic I tried deep breaths but it did not work all I could do right now was think about how dead I am.

Stomping came up the stairs and I started the shiver.

He must be so mad at me to the point where he can't even be calm at all and talk to me first before doing anything.

My door swung open revealing a tall figure and messed hair and bags under their eyes. 

Great, he is drunk to now I know I am in for it.

My dad walked up to me slowly and cracked his knuckles. "Why were you not at school?" He asked anger in his voice but he did not yell at me just was angry.

He is trying to save in energy for later I take it.

"I'm sorry dad, I was sick and I could not get outta bed I tried I really did but I just could not." I cried hoping it would convince him that I was sick and I didn't mean too even tho it is a lie.

"Bullshit!" He yelled as he grabbed my wrist tightly making me whimper and pulled me off the bed. "I came in this morning to wake you up but you were not here, you were with some guy hoeing around right?" He yelled in my face causing me too close my eyes.

"No dad please." I cried as he pushed me to the floor making me hit my face on the floor.

"YOU LIER!" He screamed as he helped me back up only to have his fist met with my eye hardly causing me to fall to the ground and cry in pain.

"dad I'm sor-" I started but I was kicked in the ribs by his foot witch still had his boots on from work so I'm sure leaving a nice bruise.

"Don't. You are worthless I can't believe your mother actually decided to keep you around you slut." He screamed as he picked me and pushed me hard to the wall causing me to cry in pain.

As I was about to say something but I was cut off by his hands meeting my neck squeezing it so it is hard for me to breath.

I struggle for a breath trying to rip his hands off my neck. 

"Never lie to me again!" He yelled in my face.

I nodded.

Tears ran down my face as I tried to get air in my lungs grabbing his wrists trying to pull them off. My eye and ribs throbbing because of the amount of force he used to hit me.

He let go of me and I fell to the floor taking in all the air I could my lungs filled with air as tears left my eyes at a fast speed.

"You are a useless piece of shit, I can't believe I ever loved you. No one could ever love someone and worthless as you, you just take up everyone's time and space just kill yourself already god." He said punching me one last time in the jaw before walking out.

He was right that is all I am and all I will ever be, no one can love me at all, I just cause pain and destruction to everything I touch. I am stupid to think anyone could love me at all, I'm ugly, worthless, stupid, a whore, no good teenage girl.

You know sometimes I like when my dad hits me because I cause pain and I deserve pain, Nothing but pain.

When my mom died that was because of me.

She was coming to pick me up from my friends house and got into a car accident so It's my fault that she was ever killed in the first place, If I never would have gone to my friends house she would have never died and My dad would have never been like this, Tristan would still be his happy self and everything would be the way it was before but its not.

I killed her so I deserve all the pain I get from this world, from school, from my dad and from myself.  

Pain is all I need. 

Pain is my only friend who stabs me in the back 100 times when I deserve it. 

I lay on my floor in a ball to scared to move because of all the pain I will feel if I do so I laid there and just cried until I was asleep.

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I woke up later still on my floor with pain running through my body my neck hurt the most.

It took all the courage in me to stand up and walk to my bathroom. Witch hurt like hell but I had to see what damage has been done to me.

Once I finished crying in pain I was finally standing in front of my mirror and looking at myself.

My eyes widened in horror.

Oh my god.   

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 YES, I KNOW SHORT BUT I COULD NOT FINISH BECAUSE OF EXAMS AND WHAT NOT.

IMMA TRY TO UPDATE BEST I CAN BUT I'M STILL GROUNDED AND EXAMS ARE TOMORROW AND THE DAY AFTER SO I HAVE TO GET TO STUDYING!!

BUT I HOPE YOU ENJOYED PLEASE VOTE AND COMMENT 

TELL ME WHAT YOU THINK IS GOING TO HAPPEN.

THANKS, LOVELIES <3 xoxo