The First Snow ✔️

Chapter 25 || Ignorance

If a year ago you said I would be having a meal while laughing and joking around with my mother than I would surely have laughed at your face or probably asked you to piss off or punched you.

That much of a non-probability was it because ever since that incident I refused to believe that my mother would forgive me and hug her.

Of course a month later after all that Hara incident, I was still bitter about my mother. But my mother made it her mission to make me forgive her and to treat me like when I was child.

I was hell bend on ignoring her effort wanting to make her taste her own medicine but when I heard her cry to my father I felt my self wanting to wipe her tears and to hurt my self for hurting her.

That was when I decided that I was not ignoring her rather making her hurt with my action. When I smiled to her the next day and hugged her, she being not shocked would be an understatement.

While after that day, both of spent each day together making fun of Suho and father. We are making up for the lost time and who knew my mother was fun to be.

And just now, we are trying to make my brother admit his feelings for Jisoo while he ears were red from all the teasing.

"Dad, tell them to stop. I swear both of them are Satan and his son." My brother whinnied which made all of laugh at his attempt to be angry while he was secretly loving it.

My mother smacked his shoulder and said, "What Satan? Me and my daughter are anything but Satan."

"Mom! You and Jennie are really an Devils!" And poked his tongue out childishly which made all of laugh.

"Let's go Jennie, we will be late for school."

Nodding my head, I bid my parents goodbye and went to school.

Along the ride, all I could think of was Hara. After a month too, she still haunted me and made my night sleepless.

During the trail, the judge ruled her ill and instead of putting her in jail, she was put in mental hospital in New Zealand.

"Still thinking about her?"

I nodded and sighed leaning back on the seat.

—

A lot has changed in the school, the Board decided to held a meeting and establish a Student Support Committee where by all the students were forced to attend it.

After the incident which was made known to the whole world through news, the school made it their mission to spread awareness about the aftermath of Bully and crimes.

It was quite hard to ignore the glances of the students when I had entered the school three days after the incident of course the big scratch on my cheek didn't help.

It was even more hard to ignore Sehun who followed me like a lost puppy every day asking for forgiveness. He was every where and I was starting to get irritated when he finally stopped after three weeks which means just yesterday he stopped following me and asking for forgiveness.

"Yah, Kim Jennie! Why can't you forgive me?! I am doing my best here and you are ignoring me making my effort go in waste!" He shouted at me while we were eating in the cafeteria. He must have had enough of my ignorance I thought.

I am still giving him the cold shoulder and might even have become much cold hearted than before.

I looked at him dead in his eyes making sure I was not effected by his anger.

"You know what, I am done. You understand. I am done trying to give you space and making you understand me. I know I should have told you about that plan but shouldn't you forgive me now! You want space? I will give you that, hope you enjoy the space." After saying that he walked out of the cafeteria leaving our group stunned.

"Jenduekie, you were being tough on him." Jisoo said quietly by my side and then the rest of them nodded.

This was nothing compared to situation I had been. I thought.

—

I picked up the required book from my locked ignoring the longing feeling and the disappointment. I finally got rid of Sehun.

Thats what I wanted right? To get him off my neck. Thats why I acted cold but why was I disappointed. Why was I still hurt that he left me. I had a reason of my own but I refused to believe it.

The whole day I ignored all of them and even took my lunch in the library. I had fought myself not to feel hurt and reminded myself to not let my situation effect my condition.

When in the library, I had thought of the consequences of me letting Sehun slip through my fingers again. I had no doubt loved him and still did and was hurt over the incident. But what I was doing was childish and Sehun didn't deserve it so I decided that I would ask for forgiveness this time and hear his side of story once again.

I loved him that much that it hurt to think him not being with me. Although for years I yearned for love from my mother, I still yearned for his love too. I had tried to deny it but when he said he would stop, my heart stopped to and I didn't want him away from me. His words yesterday was like an eye opener to me and made me realize how much I really love him.

I wanted to tell him all the truth.

So, after the school ended, I was waiting for him in the parking lot when Sehun came out. My breathe hitched when I saw him but then hurt sipped through when I saw him laughing along with a girl who had colored her hair blonde.

I took in the appearance of the girl and knew who she was. The dance captain of SM High, Han Mi So. She was gorgeous and had a slim body and tanned skin. Most of the boys in our school were head over heels for her not because she had body that screamed 'sexy' but because she was genuinely a nice person and soft spoken girl.

I knew then and there that he was sticking true to his words and finally giving up on me. For the second time that day I let hurt and disappointment get me.

Just for today, I thought. From tomorrow I would move on too.

I moved away from there sight and made my way towards my brother's car and faced away from them. Even if they see me, they won't know I saw them.

After my brother came, I quietly jumped in the front seat and closed my eyes till we reached home.

I greeted my mother and went to my room when Suho came grabbed my hand from entering my room.

"Suho oppa? What happened?"

"Jendukie, what happened to you? Don't you dare lie to me?" He said and almost immediately I could feel tears welling up.

"Suho, let me talk to her." We both turned to see our mother standing with concern all over her face. Suho tried to argue but the stern looks oh her made he shut up and went away giving us space.

As we sat down on my bed, my mother grabbed my hand rubbing soothing and said, "Will you tell mom what happened?"

By the I couldn't handle it and burst out crying. One because, I couldn't still believe my mother was with me, loving me like I wanted and two because I was tired. Tired of pretending to be strong and cold. Pretending that everything was fine.

"I am tired mom, really tired. I want all of it to stop. I don't want to be hurt anymore, mom. Please stop of for me. Please." I choked out my voice cracking along with the strong facade.

For once I wanted to a little girl who would whine for chocolate all day and not have to worry about anything. Only once.

—