Falling For My Boyfriend's Brother

Chapter 13

I swallowed as I deliberated internally what my next action was going to be. Jarrod paused and looked at me as if he was seeking my permission. I was so confused I didn't know what to do. My breathing escalated and suddenly I realised we were in his car and how uncomfortably we were both sat as our bodies were twisted awkwardly as we faced each other.

'Do you want to come inside?' I blurted out as a moronic grin covered my face.

He looked taken aback and took a few moments to respond. 'Um... yeah.'

Eager to escape the awkwardness of the atmosphere, I hurried out of the car and raced towards my front door. As Jarrod stepped through I locked it behind him, trying hard to avoid any eye contact. As we both stood there I quickly gave an excuse to rush upstairs, leaving Jarrod stood in the hallway alone.

I shut the my bedroom door behind me as I cursed myself mentally. Gosh! I felt like I was leading him in; the expectant expression on his face flashed through my mind like bright neon lights.

As I slid down my door, a feeling of absolute realisation settled in the pit of my stomach. I had feelings for Jarrod. I didn't know how strong those feelings were or what I was going to do about it but what I did know was that what I felt for him was more than friendship. Jarrod made me feel alive  and carefree; like nothing else mattered. He was a ray of light bursting through a dark and stormy night. 

Still, I couldn't stop the confusion bubbling in my mind. Whatever it was I felt for Jarrod, my feelings for John didn't lessen at all. But John was gone and he had left me. He didn't even trust me and what was a relationship without trust? 

I stood up as I heard Jarrod call for me. 'I'll just be two minutes!' Quickly I rushed into my bathroom and washed my face then changed into a simple top and jeans then ran like lightening downstairs.

Taking a moment, I gazed at Jarrod who sat on the sofa with his face in his hands. His body was frozen rigid, almost as though he was a status. A breathtakingly beautiful status. 

Walking slowly, I stood in front of him, wondering whether he was ok. From his body language he looked upset. As though he sensed me, Jarrod dropped his hands and met my eyes. His eyes looked void and resolute. They warmed a little as he stared at me. 

'Are you okay, Jarrod?' I asked tenatively. 

As though he was startled by the question, Jarrod stood up so he was facing me. Stepping forward he held my face in his hands. 

'I think you're amazing, you know. Did you know that?' He paused and the sadness in his voice suffused his face. 'I'm not sure you do because you keep pushing me away. When I think I've broken that wall you've built you put it back up even higher than before. Sometimes I think the only one that can break it is that boyfriend of yours. But then you nearly kissed me just now, didn't you? You wanted to, I could see it in your eyes.'

Hearing this surprised me. I didn't know Jarrod thought any of this. I felt guilty at the longing he was expressing and the way I kept pushing him and pushing him. But he was right, I did want to kiss him.

My eyes dropped to his lips then back to his smoldering eyes. 'You're right. I did want to kiss you.' Then I crashed my lips to his.

The raw passion of the kiss seemed to ignite as sparks surged through my entire body. I couldn't remember the last time I felt so much passion and desire. The ferocious but gentle way in which he kissed me made me feel so wanted. That alone fed my desire for him. I gripped his hair tightly as he rested his hand on the small of my back, pressing my body into his. The kiss was so deep that I was unable to breath; unwillingly I broke away.