Only One Love ( larry stylinson )

chapter 12

__chapter 12__________

Louis POV.

Its been an hour an hour since he left. An hour for me to feel more guilty, and worthless. An hour of loneliness. An hour of regret, just ticking by slowly.

An hour without him.

All the boys found me outside, ten minutes after he.. left.. and, I was in the pouring rain, hugging my knees, rocking back and forth. I didn't feel the tears, because the wouldn't come. I just felt numb. Someone carried me up, not caring that I was soaking wet, and put me in my flat. They asked me questions, gave me sympathetic glances, and confusing ones also, but I didn't say a word. I didn't even flinch. So, they eventually left, coming up every so often to check on me. I think Liam feels bad, but he doesn't show it. He is just the daddy D he is. But, I should have known better.

Why? Why did I let him get to me? I knew that if I let someone get to me, I would ruin there lives, and they would hate me forever. That's what they- no I, did to Jamie, and now Harry. Why cant I do anything right? Why does the world hate me?

Why do I love him?

I felt something wet and warm on my cheek, as I felt it slide down. I didn't bother to wipe the silent tears that are flowing down, because I... I just cant. Cant move, cant See, cant hear,

cant feel.

I have sat on this couch, for what feels like eternity, as the minutes pass by without him. How long has it been now? What two, three hours? I couldn't care less. I just felt my heart tear piece by piece. Slowly fading away from the stitches that were there before.

Tear.

Fall.

Break.

Shattered.

Repeating the process over and over for every piece of my heart, every minute that he is going farther away.

It felt for what like hours, before I moved again. But the reason was for the shiny, little razor taunting my in the bathroom. I walked over there, entering the bathroom. I saw the little blade, sitting on the counter, looking at it. I grabbed it, gripping the handle, looking at the blade. I saw a reflection, a broken boy, with bloodshot eyes, bags under them, face pale and chapped lips. Then, as I looked at the boy in the blade, I thought, would Harry want me to do this?

I thought about it, as I looked at the blade. I don't know how long I stood there, but It was to the point where I could see light come from the window.

For what seems like forever, I finally dropped the blade. I couldn't do it, for Harry's sake. It pained me to know that he hated me, but I couldn't do this. He would hate me even more if I did this.

The door burst open, to reveal a panicky Zayn, him being breathless, looking at me as if I had two heads.

"Zayn what is-

"Harry's missing."

Harrys POV

I woke up, feeling my head pounding, and a very big pain all over my body. I tried to move my hands, but I felt a restraint on them, and then I realized that I was tied up. I opened my eyes, only to see more darkness. I felt something in my mouth, restraining me from talking, but only muffled sounds.

Where am I? How did I get here? Whats happening? Where am I going? What happened to me? Wheres Louis-

Louis.

I remembered. I remembered what Liam told me, and how Louis told everyone that I was gay. I couldn't believe him.. but I guess I didn't let him explain either. God, I fucked up again..