Chapter 4 - The Bad Side of Town
Grace
Well it had been a couple days since my encounter with cute mystery boy… did I just call him cute? Ugh.. I mean he is cute but.. No I can’t get attached to anyone, even if it’s just because I think their cute. Clearly they all end up leaving or getting hurt and I can’t afford to get hurt anymore, or hurt someone for that matter.
It’s depressing I guess to think about it, but it’s true. Everyone I ever knew and loved has left me in some way, or I was forced to leave. My parents, Alice, and I guess the one who hurt me the most… Sebastian. He is my ex boyfriend and at the time I was so head over heels. He was wonderful to me and he understood everything about me; all my emotions, my problems, all my flaws. And I had to go and fuck that up, obviously, as I do with everything good in my life.
You see everything was perfect between me and Sebastian, until his “friend,” Oliver came into the picture. I wouldn’t call him much of a friend after what I realized what had happened. One night, a couple of days after mine and Sebastian’s six month anniversary there was a party going on. Oliver had told us about the party, and so we went, as that was a regular thing to do back then I guess. Nothing else better to do. When we got there though, there were loads of people and somehow me and Sebastian ended up getting separated through the crowd. I was looking for him everywhere, when I stumbled on Oliver.
“Relax Grace, just have a drink, you’ll find him. He’s probably looking for you too.” Oliver said to me, handing me a drink that he had poured for me.
I smiled and took the drink, saying, “You’re right, no sense in stressing, we always end up finding each other at the end of these things anyway.” And with that I took that drink, well pretty much chugged it, since it was my first one of that night. I had been quite the heavy drinker back then, and one drink would never hit me as hard as that one did that night. Taking that drink was the worst idea I‘ve ever had, because pretty soon I couldn’t even see straight, or walk without someone having to help me. Normally I guess that wouldn’t have been as much of a problem if I had Sebastian there, but he wasn’t. I never found him that night.. So of course who stepped in to “help,” me? Oliver.
His warm clammy hands on my waist, lead me up the stairs into a random room. He laid me down on the bed and at this point my whole body was numb. It was like I knew what was going on around me, but I couldn’t move, speak, or react to any of it. It was a scary feeling, but at that moment I couldn’t feel anything. I was just completely frozen in that moment in time. Oliver’s hot breath was all over my neck and chest, and I could feel his disgusting touch all over my legs. I tried to yell or say something, anything, to get him off of me. But I couldn’t, my voice was non existent and he started undressing me. Somewhere in the middle of all this, the door opened from the hall and the light poured into the room. I managed to twist my head and saw Sebastian standing there at the door, mouth open. I wanted to say so much, I wanted to cry, I wanted to explain, but it was no use. I could barely move or speak, so Oliver of course turned it all around on me. And Sebastian believed him.
You have no idea how much that hurt. Oliver set me up, I only realized he must have spiked my drink the next day. I tried calling Sebastian, I went to his house. Frantically trying to get in touch with him so he can hear me out. I know I’m stupid for taking that drink, but maybe if he heard me out he would understand that I’d never consciously do anything to hurt him or betray him.. And maybe it wasn’t completely my fault? But he never answered my calls, he slammed the doors in my face, he didn’t want to hear it. And just like that, I lost everything in my life. The one good thing that I actually had, gone. And it was all my fault for taking that drink. For trusting someone I didn’t know. For not going to look for Sebastian when I still had the chance. I’ll never forgive myself for the hurt I caused him. My feelings don’t matter, but he didn’t deserve it.

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