Crave ✔

Chapter 42

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Chapter 42

       "You do not need me to give you these answers. You already know them, they will come as your memories do."

       "I'm asking now. Just tell me North, please." His eyes flickered to mine, that defensive icy guard from before slowly slipping away. He let out a sigh before dragging a heavy hand through his dark hair.

       "The red is the immortal power thrumming through me. It shows when I use it, when the eternal being in me rises. The black is the wolfs, and the blue is my always. I keep it for you. You preferred it the most of all the colors I had ever used."

       I wouldn't let the flutter that one statement sent through my chest drop my harsh gaze. Just because I knew I could never truly and completely leave him, did not mean I was anywhere near done being furious with him.

       "And the different bodies?" I edged away from the hand he raised into the air, his fingers reaching to brush against my cheek. They hesitated between us, that sad look crossing his bright eyes once again.

       "My true form is hard to control in such a world as this. As I have said, it was not made for immortals, we do not belong here. The longer I used it the harder the madness reigned. Even now it is easier to be like this. This realm accepts me more." Those blue eyes dropped to my hands, the ones I was unconsciously curling and uncurling into fists as his fell back to his side.

       "You can change whenever you want?"

       His eyes flickered back to mine, the bright blue nearly reflecting off the darkness slowly falling around us. He gave me a slow nod.

       "Do you remember everything now?" I asked softly as I turned my back to him to walk towards an icy vine wrapping around one of the thick stone pillars of the garden.

       "Not everything." He had followed behind me, his voice coming from only a few feet away. I let my eyes trail the cracks in the ice freely. So broken, yet held together. "Much from the eternity before you are missing, but with each day more surfaces..." He paused then, his presence like a giant, warm beacon shining behind me. "All I needed was you. All I ever needed. You are my change in this world of consistency."

       I did not answer him. I couldn't. Though his words ringed with truth, I did not want to hear endearing sentiments when my chest ached as it did. Then a thought entered my head, one that sent a shiver down my spine. "I can not die... Can I?" He stilled behind me, his breathing turning too low to hear.

       "Yes, you can. But when a star dies, there is no moving on. This life is your afterlife. You just disappear."

       Oh... That was a far more unpleasant reality than I would have thought. If I die—again—then that is it. No more Mountain, no more wolf-bornes, no more him.

       "But you cannot grow old." He added softly, though my mind was still reeling from the completely-gone-thing. "You will not age, and I will never let you die." There was no mistaking the oath ringing through his words, that unyielding promise. It only made my heart even more confused.

       There was silence between us for a while after that, my eyes glued to the ice, his glued to me. I did not know if Terif was still hanging around the entrance. It felt as if we had been talking for days, much less hours.