Forever will end one day

Let's get married!

All breathless and scared, that what he had just said didn't convince him, Arthit waited for Kongpob to answer him. Well, let alone lose that deer facing the headlights look and answer him in any coherent way possible.

Why was it such and hard decision? Why would it be shocking to him? Or didn't he want to get married to him? A small inferior complex caught up to him, thankfully Arthit had a lot of experience with those. He shook it off almost as quickly as the thought found its voice.

"Arthit.." He did look shocked beyond reason. Somehow they way he finally moved to the study's armchair, seemed not just hard for him, but also painful in a way. Kongpob was stepping as all his body, all the muscles he usually used were tight and hard and painful. Could such shock do this for him. Arthit wanted to step toward him, but the sudden head shake from Kongpob made him doubt. Also the silence, though only a few seconds long, was painful and making him doubt everything.

"Arthit." Kongpob started again. "You can't be serious. This is not a normal time to ask someone to marry you."

"Why not?" Arthit fought with himself. He felt deep down, that if he pressures Kongpob in a wrong way, he would end it in a second. He would take away the chance to spend the last months together, not to talk about.. the end, it would never occur.

"Why isn't this a normal time or why isn't it reasonable to ask me to marry you? Are you dumb or are you pathetic?" It seemed that he was going out of his way to make Arthit to step back from his reasoning.

"Well.. let's be honest. I've never been trying to sell you the idea, that I'm normal. We can't even talk about you yourself. Also, its true. Me, falling in love with you. It can't possibly be normal. Something from deep inside of me had to be reflected by you. Something about me.. maybe my soul? somehow.. someway, we are supposed to be together. Am I the only one thinking that?"

"No not that. But isn't the timing awfully wrong, and the reasoning. Only some time ago you were really angry with me. Not unreasonably, but still. I don't want our marriage be a make-up-kid, like normal people do after a fight."

"What are you talking about Kongpob?" Arthit could understand the reasoning of Kongpob, but it seemed like he would grasp at strings as tender as a spiderweb, and with desperation you could rarely see from him.

"I'm talking about people, who get into a fight, make up and then with great joy they have a kid!" He looked desperate to get his point over to Arthit.

"You don't have to tell me about the technics of making up with someone. I'm talking about that we have not even gotten to the make up sex yet and you already talk in this kind of reasoning." Arthit had to repress his laughter. He knew it was unfair to tease Kongpob, but how can a gay man bring up this kind of example from a hetero couple relationship, to show the unreasonability of Arthit's proposal. For him it made almost no sense.

"Kongpob. I did not ask you to marry me, to make up. I did not plan to come back, before I was attacked, to make up through this. I was planning to torture by not to even talking to you." Arthit sighed deeply. "I wanted to come back to you to, to make you come to your senses. To make you understand, that you are nobody without me. You are not supposed to live longer without me."

"This makes no sense. As I've lived so long and I know so much. It's almost a duty of mine to live as long as I can. To know as much, to give people around me as much as I can." Arthit almost swore under his breath. Did this bitch really got into his head somehow, or was it normal for people to either think more selfishly? Or lose more and more of their egotistical tendencies?

"Kongpob. Don't you want to marry me?" This made his expression change. It looked like Kongpob was all ready to reasonably argue with Arthit, but he was a lot less stable in the emotional department of their relationship.