I went into school the next day on a much better note. I was happy and smiling and greeting all of my friends. I don't know. Something about him made me extremely happy. The very thought of him put a smile on my face. He greeted me in the morning and asked if I was walking over to lunch and I said yes and he said great and walked to homeroom. I wondered if I was coming off too strong.
He sat with me at lunch at me and Joy's usual table. Joy of course was ecstatic to hear the news of us being together. She started asking all these questions, half of which I weren't prepared to answer. I mean, we hadn't even been together for 24 hours. Calm down.
At the end of the day he walked up to me before he left for his soccer game and asked me how I was.
"Oh, I'm good. Really good actually." No word vomit, Mia.
"That's good. Look, I gotta go to my soccer game. I'll text you later?" He said it with a smile.
"Yeah, yeah, that'd be cool." So much for playing it cool. He hugged me and walked away. For some reason I was frozen. It was just a hug but it felt amazing. Like it was such a perfect hug. I wanted him to come back and hug me again and never stop hugging me. I then realized I standing in the middle of the hallway staring into space. So, I went to my next class.
The rest of the day I felt kind of sad. Was it normal for me to miss him? Seriously. He asked me out less than 24 hours ago. I saw him an hour ago. Don't be stupid. I was getting too attached. I had to chill out.
After volleyball practice I sat and stared at my phone. I knew he wasn't going to text me. He was still at his game at another school. I put the phone back in my pocket. It would be like watching paint dry. The less I thought about it the faster it would happen. My mom pulled up to the school and I hopped in the front seat of the truck. I hadn't told my mom about Shane and I yet. Well, actually, I hadn't really told her about Shane at all. I would've told her but I freaked out and so I just let it play out. She'd find out eventually.
We got home and I jumped out so I could get inside quickly. I ate dinner and took a long shower. And by long, I mean almost an hour long. When I got out, I wrapped the towel around my body and picked up my phone. I had a message.
1 New Message: Shane- Hey are you going to the Dorney trip in a couple weeks?
For those of you who don't know what Dorney is, it's basically an average sized amusement park with some pretty decent roller coasters. Of course I was going. I went every year.
To: Shane- Yes. Are you?
1 New Message: Shane- Well now I am.
Awh. He wanted to go because I was. I completely forgot about that trip. I had to turn in the slip soon. The trip wasn't until October but they get tickets way in advance. I took the slip out of my bag and gave it to my mom so she could fill it out. I realized how distant I was being with my mom lately. But then again I was never really close with her in the first place. She signed the slip and handed it back to me. I went back down to my room and accidentally fell asleep and forgot to respond to Shane.
~
A couple weeks went by and Shane and I were doing just about the same as day 1. The relationship was going very slow. It kinda bothered me a little because I can't tell you how much I wanted to kiss him but I wouldn't do that. I didn't want to force him to do something if I didn't know if he wanted that too. The Dorney field trip was today. We'd be leaving at 11 AM and getting back around midnight. We signed up for which bus we'd ride on to and from the park about a week ago. Shane and I both signed up for bus 2.
When we got on the bus, Shane sat next to me. Both of us realized we forgot our sweatshirts and laughed about how stupid we were because it was gonna be cold. I took my friend Ryan's sweatshirt. When we got to Dorney, Shane and I walked with our friends Ryan and Jaida. About half way through the night, Ryan and I were ready for the haunted houses. Shane, on the other hand, was not. He was terrified of them. But since the rest of us were going, he went in too. The haunted house was supposed to be a haunted asylum. It was terrifying. At one point someone jumped out at us and Shane reached down and grabbed my hand without even thinking about it. It was so cute I almost started cracking up. The rest of the night we walked around holding hands and laughing. We went to get in line for Steel Force. It was a roller coaster with a huge and steep drop. We walked up and only a couple people were in line. One of which was Alec. I used to have a huge crush on Alec. But of course he was very uninterested in me. He saw Shane and I together and smirked.
"Hold on, I got you guys." I was very concerned what he was up to. The coaster came back and Alec and his friend got in and told the guy to let them go without us. And he did. Jaida and Ryan got on with them, so now we were completely alone waiting in line. When the coaster came back, Alec kept saying "See. See. I got you."
He didn't really help me. Nothing happened. He didn't kiss me, which kind of disappointed me. At around 11:15 PM they told us to meet up to get back on the bus. Shane took the window seat. I was so tired that I could barely hold my head up. He offered his shoulder for me to lean on. I took his offer and almost fell asleep multiple times. But I managed to keep my eyes open. I looked down at his phone. He was texting someone. A girl someone. I got a little worried but I didn't want to snoop so I closed my eyes. I was about to fall asleep again when he started talking to me.
"It's not what you think."
"What are you talking about?" I was genuinely confused.
"The girl. She's just a friend. I'm talking to her about cutting. Well talking her out of it." It was sweet. It had occurred to me that I never told him about my cutting problem. I didn't really want him to know in case it freaked him out. I hadn't actually done it in almost a month. I figured if I wasn't doing it, I didn't have to tell him about it. Now that I know he's accepting of it I guess I didn't have to hide it anymore. But I still wasn't too keen to the idea of telling him. So I kept it to myself for now.
"Oh, I wasn't looking at your phone." I said while leaning up to look at his face. When I made eye contact with him, I had such a strong urge to kiss him. I just wanted to grab his face between my hands and kiss him. Once again, I decided against the idea and put my head back down on his shoulder.
We got back to the school at midnight like planned. Shane hugged me goodbye and texted me on the way home from the school.
