Dear Jenny,
Hey, sweetie. I miss you so much, its horrible. I still can't get over why God gave you cancer. Like I seem to say all the time: cancer sucks.
Its only been two weeks and I feel like giving up. I can't, anymore. I don't know what else to do. It seems like everything is just wrong. The only things that made me happy is slowly disappearing.
First, you. Lately, the boys haven't been talking to me. I mean, there may be a reason, but I don't know. Its like they've given up on me. Like, they would usually come and talk to me often. They'd come in and sit on my bed, rub my back, just a little bit. Giving me a little comfort. They'd come in, shake me a little when I'd be asleep, and tell me dinner was done, or tell me that eventually, everything would be okay. They'd tell me encouraging things. That would make me want to continue just a hair longer. But now, they never come in, they just knock on my door and walk away. Maybe I didn't show enough appreciation to them. Or they just can't take it anymore, either.
And, guess what. My mum called yesterday. She asked how I was. I told her the truth. I told her I was horrible. And for some reason, she went crazy. She started yelling. She said that I was a horrible person for feeling bad. She said I was just a fucking piece of trash. That I wasn't worthy of her. Of anything I have. She told me I was ungrateful.
Out of anyone in the world, she said that to me. She was one person I could call and just know everything would be okay. Just by hearing her voice. And now she fucking hates me. Can you believe it? Because I can't.
But, then again, I can't believe any of this.
I'm losing hope. I'm losing myself. In what? I'm not sure, yet.
But, maybe one day, all of this will be okay. Maybe one day, years from now, everyone will be happy.
Actually, I don't know if I believe that anymore. If everyone fucking hates me, then why should I still be here?
I guess the fans would be crushed. But that's all I can think of.
Me leaving sounds like the idea of a lifetime.
Anyway, I'll talk to you later.
And I hope you know,
You never left my head,
And if I ever let you down,
I'm sorry.
-Sorry
I'll love you forever, and don't you forget that.
Calum. xx
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Ayyyee. So, I hope y'all have a nice Halloween!
So yeah have a jolly good day
YOU ARE READING
Jenny.
Fanfiction"How could you give someone so peaceful to the world, something so fucked up towards the world?" I ask 'god', thinking he could hear me. "She was one of the best things I had... And you took her away from me.. Just like that? What did I do? What di...
