Collection of Poems

Addiction

God I wanted to be your addiction
Not to control you
But so you could be all mine
So you would be with me always
But I realized
You were already hooked on a different sort of drug
Not the human one
Not any narcotic
But rather
Addicted to the pleasure that comes from knowing you've played with someone's heart
That satisfaction mixed in with guilt
But you don't feel the guilt, do you?
You don't feel the remorse
Only a sick giddiness
At knowing the control you had over them
I didn't know it then
But I was already hooked on you
Destined to break in your grip
I saw my life as if from afar
Unable to make cognizant choices
Only choosing based on how I felt
And all I wanted to feel was you
So you can imagine how that went
You can imagine the shattering of my mind
My heart , irreparably breaking
My life, sinking into the darkness
And I don't know if it was your fault
Or mine
I want to blame myself
Because who blames the addiction, when the person is the one who decided to try it in the first place?