Hidden secret

She was my shining star

Toms POV

I felt sorry for Ethan. I had to admit I was partly to blame for Belle's move. I was annoyed at her to, she wasn't answering her phone and everyone was worried about her. I couldn't help but think though that Ethan had a point when she was so secretive and no one knew why. I knew Mils and Esme didn't know either. It bothered me. There was more to that girl than everyone knew.

I went back to were I had left Jade talking to Lauren about eyeliner or something. I wrapped my arms around her. Belle's disappearance made me realise how lucky I was to have Jade but made me aware we had to love what we have got because when it's gone, it's gone. Me and Jade were going back to LA in six weeks so I could work on a new film that was about hockey.

I really hoped I saw Belle before we go. She was as I have said 10000 times before my little sis and I cared about her! It pained me to think she was probably out alone somewhere, in my head I thought she was out in Birmingham somewhere but inside I knew she had gone back to end it were it started.

Belle's POV

I set of with Hayden down to safari the club that dominated my life only 4 years ago, I used to have fake id to get in but now I was going legally. I had a short red dress on and red heels. "Does Dee still come here" I asked Hayden cheerily. I had been looking forward to seeing my best friend Deanne or 'Dee' she was my main chic and my saviour on quite a few occasions. She was a reason I could stick knowing I was a made to save a life and I had failed at it. Hayden stood still and looked at me "Belle...umm Dee passed away a few months ago"

I gulped, tears exploded from my eyes. I was going to ask how but I thought I already knew the answer to that. I asked anyway "how?"

"Overdose" Hayden replied sadly.

I was distraught! I just wanted to go home but I had promised to meet Mel, Max ,Mike and Elle. I had missed them but Dee was my main girl and knowing she would not be there! Another issue with being back in Ireland was I was on the hard stuff again. "Hayden" I asked

"Yes Belle" he looked questioning as I cried on the floor at this point.

"Am I doing the right thing? Coming back and working as a runner? Leaving Uni behind?" I asked

"Baby Belle, I want you to know I have never made a right choice in my life, I wouldn't know" he answered

"But you have" I cried "you treat me nicely even if the others don't"

"If I were you I would have stuck out uni, the hell you will get here will be worse" he answered

I knew he was right. My wise old brother again I thought. " Hayden, remember when Cait died she thanked me for everything I had done, I should have done more how could she say thank you. She told me she was sorry, how could she be sorry."

"Oh Belle" he cried hugging me "you could not have done anymore. You did your best angel, you had 36 operations to try and save Cait, you did all you could. You were the one that kept her going till she was 15. Then it was out of your hands. You must remember Belle, Cait was mum's world, dad's pride and joy. They wanted to save her but they didn't think about you"

"I hate being the spare part. The pig for slaughter, why do you think I am vegetarian. Hayden your not even what I thought you were. Go away get out of my life" he looked so shocked. I stepped into Safari to be greeted by an excited group yelling "BELLE is back"

I grabbed a apple sourz to ease the pain. I danced wildly around the club. I was higher than a plane but I was a spare part. I could never be a a angel. I was damned but there desire to match Cait. Cait was there world I was the extra.

- a week on-

Ethan's POV

It had been a week since Belle had gone. I felt more alone than ever. That girl was my world she was my life. I needed her in my world she made me happy and I had lost her. She hadn't replied to any messages for a week. She was ignoring the world, everyone was worried. Even laid back Rupert was a tad concerned.

The only good thing that had happened in the last week was Dan had seen sense and given Esme a massive talk on how he was sorry and he had only ever wanted her as she was his world. Jade and Tom had decided to go out for a meal to celebrate there 7 year anniversary and Rupert was out at innocence. I had a free house but I could only picture her mouse brown hair and her sparkling grey eyes.

I pined for that girl like a fish longs for water. I had cried openly about her a couple of times but everyone was losing the faith that she would return. She had blanked all calls,ignored all text messages. She was lost. My beautiful girl was lost. She was my rock and somehow she had slipped away. I had let her slip away. Tom came in obviously back from the meal.

" mate I brought you a doughnut I know you like them" he whispered.

I shook my head. " I am not hungry"

"Buddy, you have got to eat" he replied obviously concerned.

"No" I answered "not now"

" you have said that all this week, you look an absolute state" Tom muttered

"No I am fine" I replied beginning to snap. People said girls were the emotional sex but at the moment I was a wreck. I had never been like this before. Never.

Belles POV.

Dee had been up here with me last time. Gosh I missed Dee. She was my main girl she only knew bits of my story but she was a clever girl I knew she had worked it out. She was my world I loved her. She had gone to early. She could be a angel she was pure her parents loved her. She was talented and stunningly beautiful. She wasted away on the stuff me and the others adored. She had been so unfortunate, she was my shining star. I wanted to see her face again.

I gazed across the mountain ranges. It was here on this very bench I found out I would be dead before I was 21. I remembered watching a little party come out of the pub below and a 21 ballon escaped the grasp of one of its members. It had flown up into the sky. Hayden had caught it. It was pink with a glittery 21 on it. He had passed it to me.

I had been so naive about it. I turned to my beloved family and said "one day I will 21". I think it made my family realise they had to tell me. I remember my mums words " Belle, my darling Belle you are unlikely to reach 21 sweet heart, you have these operations to save your sister. Eventually it will kill you"I had learned about saviour siblings at school- well the times I wasn't in a operating theatre anyway.

I was crying now I knew what to do. This was were I had found myself, it was also the place my soul snapped. I knew what I had to do to find it. I stood on the edge of the mountain. Wiggled my legs and prepared to go. I was ready I thought the time had come, I wouldn't reach 21. I let go.