What Was Lost // (Harry Styles FanFic)

Chapter 12

Sutter's POV

The morning after Fuller's party is rough. I'm not projectile vomiting like my sister, but my head is pounding. I guess I didn't realize how much I drank, especially after my talk with Lilly. Isn't it crazy how someone can sober you up but then make you feel drunk too?

She did that to me.

    I hear Jo gagging again in our shared bathroom and I can't help the little laugh that slips out. I'm definitely going to remind her about her embarrassing attempt at flirting with Jesse last night too.

     But all joking and teasing vanishes when I think of Lilly, and that she admitted to me that she did cocaine and ecstasy. Ecstasy is bad enough, but I've heard of a couple people trying that or whatever, it's not as hardcore as cocaine. I wonder if her and Denny had sex while she was high on E. Does that count as raping her? Can I get him arrested for that?

     I'll have to research.

     But her doing cocaine, absolutely blows my mind and breaks my heart. The girl I knew before I left, wouldn't have touched drugs with a ten foot pole. She couldn't even watch that TV show intervention without getting all worked up.

     I can't imagine her snorting anything into her beautiful body, especially something that is harming her. She's too good for that, and I just wish I knew how to show her that.

I hear Jo flush the toilet and then brush her teeth. She lays on my bed when she's finished and puts her hands on her forehead.

"Feeling better?" I ask. I'm a little upset she was drinking last night, but I'm underage and was too, so it's not like I can tell her she shouldn't.

"I'm never drinking again." She declares.

"How much did you drink exactly?"

"Way too much apparently. I drank the same amount as Lil and she was perfectly fine. I must just be a light weight."

     My sister and Lilly are close to the same size, Jo just maybe being a couple inches taller. Lilly was about 5'4 and had the athletic body build even after not playing sports for a while and having a baby. Her body should only be able to handle as much as Jo's, if not less.

     "Can I tell you something and you keep it only between us?" I ask, wanting to confide in her but only if I knew she wouldn't blab about it. She's not normally like that, but this isn't the usual shit we share between each other.

     "You know you can." Looking at me with questioning eyes.

     "Lilly can probably drink more than me and not be drunk. She did a lot of that while we were gone apparently, and some other things too." I still just can't picture it.

     "What kind of other things?" Jo asks quietly.

     "Well Jesse told me the reason she and Nadine weren't close anymore was because Lil had started using some drugs. I asked her about it last night and she admitted to me that she used cocaine and did ecstasy a couple times." I say a couple but I know it's probably more. I just like to think it wasn't a lot, and I don't want to upset Jo too much.

     "No.." She whispers, and I see tears fill her eyes. "Last night when we were talking, it was amazing, you know? We still had that same bond we had before, but I could tell she was still hurting over us leaving. But she was doing so well and we were laughing together and everything. I thought she was doing okay now?"

     "She is doing better now," I say trying to reassure her, because I see she's starting to panic. "This was before we came back. She started getting better even before then. But she was really torn up for a long time, I guess she didn't know how else to cope. And it's not like Denny was really trying to help her." I could literally kill him and not lose a wink of sleep for not trying to help her out of this mess. If anything he only made it worse.