The One You Can't Forget (The One, #1)

fourteen

Hainsey

Damn her.

Damn Emyln Juliette Walker for caring about me, and for being able to see right through my bullshit lie.

I should have known that she'd analyze my response when I said Mom used the money to hire a lawyer. When things broke apart in my family, there was no way my mom would use my funds for a lawyer. Just like every other choice my mom has made, the drugs have tainted her vision of everything. If she were to sober up and realize what she's been doing, she'd hate herself.

I shake my head. I can't let the ifs, whens, and buts get to me. I can't stop living the life I have even if it is as shitty as can be. Life keeps moving forward no matter what you do. 

Ems knows I've lied to her. And if she's still the same as she was back then, I know she's going to dig deep to try and discover the truth. There is one connection between the two of us that I need to shut down immediately: Val.

She's the only one that knows everything about my life, and also the one left from middle school when Ems was still around. I know the two of them have talked and Val hasn't said anything. Yet.

That's the keyword. I need to enforce the idea that I don't want Ems knowing anything more. And I know that once I tell Val, I can trust her – she's never revealed any secrets that need to be kept.

Jogging upstairs to my bedroom, I decide against a shower and change into a new pair of clothes instead. I then gather up the usual: my wallet, the keys to my truck, and a sweater. Although the days are hot, the nights cool down immensely.

Before I leave to head down to the ice cream parlour Val works at, I check in on my mom. She's in her bedroom with all the blinds closed, and is passed out. Sleep is really the other thing she ever does when she's not busy with the heroin high. She's not a functional drug user.

It's a terrible thing for me to even think, but sometimes I wish she would overdose. If she did, yeah, I'd be upset. It's just...things would be a helluva lot easier for me. For one thing, I wouldn't feel guilty about enabling her to use such a deadly drug. Secondly, the money I'm making would be put to good use for my future. I turn nineteen in a month – I'm not supposed to be doing this kind of thing. I'm supposed to be creating a place for myself in the future. Yet here I am, muddling my way through each goddamned day that passes.

I sound selfish.

But sometimes the truth itself is the most selfish entity.

My mom doesn't deserve to suffer, and unless I can find a way to get her on the road to recovery, an overdose would be the best thing for her. She was a good person that got betrayed in ways she didn't deserve.

And I'm a kid that deserves an easier life.

* * *

The ice cream parlour Val works at isn't busy today – thank God. Usually, there's a line-up going out the door.