Cornucopia

Me (MimiZanna)

Me

Sometimes I wonder if I could go back to my old self,

Start caring for everyone's feelings,

Be as cool as ever.

Seal my heart with locks,

Bury the keys in Airasika.

Even though I have so many friends,

It's all repeating.

The wounds are replaying,

As if they had never healed.

So many listeners, but no commitment.

They all disappear like rainbows,

After a rain.

But I guess, it's my fault,

I keep wanting friendship...

I should expect betrayal,

But loyalty is my prison.

"The lesser the people, the lesser the shit you deal with,"

So keep your diameter smaller.

The real Trouble Maker is Trust,

Too much, and its lost,

Too less, and there's none,

And Acceptable is something I do not know of.

Tears are like stars,

You feel them real only in the dark.

Confessing my feelings is scary,

Cux rejection is worse.

Sometimes I wonder if I can go back to my old self.

But I feel, People like the current me.

Not the current berry juice, of coarse.

I wonder what's wrong with the old me...

Is she too weak or too strong?

Too annoying or too quiet?

Too nosy or too comforting?

Too reliable or too depending?

I am lost in this Land of Pretendation,

Too confused to choose my Actions.

Is this called self-centered?

Is it wrong to be like that?

Sometimes I am scared of my ability of creativity,

I am afraid of losin' my loved and cherished ones.

I am afraid of the Monster inside me,

For Hatred is my Buddy,

And Love is a Lost Case.

This feeling of Want,

This feeling of Loneliness,

This feeling of Love,

Consumes my Energy,

It makes me weak, It makes me broken, it makes me angry.

This heart is Fragile, not just a Beat-Box,

So please, don't Judge.

It hurts to be hated by the one you love,

So be careful which flower you choose,

the White Rose or the Purple Tulip.