Both Sides Now.

Chapter 7

Sitting in the kitchen I’m eating a beagle while drinking a cup of chocolate milk. Damn I forgot how good it is. I think as I chug the whole glass. I feel in my pocket for my phone when I feel a piece of paper. Pulling it out I’m completely grateful that I didn’t wash these. It’s the title of coffee boys blog. I pull out my phone from the same pocket and call Abby. She answers quickly.
“Hey” she says
“Can I use your computer?” I ask grabbing a glass of water from the tap.
“Uh sure, any reason why?”
“Because I don’t have one. Anyways I’ll be there in 10, we can get coffee after.”
“Oh ok” she says and I grab bag tie my shoes and place the piece of paper in my pocket again. I’m wearing shorts and a button up tee shirt and it’s beautiful out. Except for the fact that my car’s hotter than hell. Driving to Abby’s is way quicker then I thought it’d be 5:30 on a weekday shouldn’t be this quick. I don’t know.

Pulling into her driveway I knock on her door.
“Hey” she says and I walk in.
“So are you going to tell me why you need my computer?”
“I'll explain in a second” I say sitting down on her office chair. Her room is surprisingly fluffy. Lots of teddy bears. There’s a poster on her wall I think it’s an NSYNC poster but I could be wrong.
“Ok so for the past month there’s been this dude. Me and Luke came up with the name coffee boy. Because he’s at the diner 24/7 anyways he’s always writing or reading so one day while I was on my run I saw the title of his blog. So maybe I could find it and find out more about him” I say as Abby puts in her username and password.
“Oh yeah I’ve seen him a few times, what’s his name?”
“No idea”
“Do you find him attractive?” she says and I’m baffled. Do I like him? I mean he’s hot and mysterious and he could be gay. So maybe I do but I don’t know if I do or not.
“I-I don’t know” I say and go into Google. “a guide to being you”  
A list of URLs and website names come up.
“Hmmmm” I say scrolling down. “Found it!” I say clicking on a link.
“A guide to being you by:Alfie Jones”
“His names Alfie?” Abby asks
“Maybe, anyways this is it that’s what it looked like when I saw it”
He does have an artsy name. It's not Abraham but it’s something. I think and begin to read.
“starting off in new york I had to grow up for myself, going on the subway by myself to go to school typical preschooler things, all being by myself but I like it. Me myself and I, and my books. This is kind of my outlet. My way to express myself. This’ll be my guide on how to survive high school and how to be yourself in a way that you’d never see possible.
                                          06/11/1998
  Moving from New York to a small suburban Canadian town has well brought a lot on my shoulders. Saying goodbye to my best friend and saying goodbye to everyone in the big Apple. Has brought me into a slump, but maybe it’s for the best? A fresh start? I don’t know. I’m just nervous. There’s a lot of cute little shops around and it’s really quiet compared to the hustle and bout of NY. I’ve enrolled for grade 12 at a school here and I’m starting to get used to this place. But so far no one new no one interesting.
                                           07/16/1998
Ok hi second entry here, I’ve been going to a coffee shop for he past few weeks the 'cold brew' it’s an adorable little diner with fresh coffee and pastries of all sorts. My favorites are the banana bread and the Boston cream donut. It's just a preference.
I finished every single book I own since I’ve moved here. And I have no idea where a bookstore is. Anyways summer is going well. I’ve been enjoying walks around the town and seeing the nature, that’s something you never see in New York is how much greener it is, and how many animals live here. It's incredible. I’ve seen so many regulars that come into the ‘cold brew' everyone new and exciting and amazing. Except they aren’t. Anyways see you in a month”

“Is that it?” I say a scrolling down to the end of the page. “Well his name’s Alfie”
“hmmm I think you’re looking way too into it. He’s probably just a new guy who has a lot on his mine.” Abby says punching my shoulder I’m a little unsatisfied at the outcome. I don’t know he’s a mystery.

Opening the doors of the coffee shop I’m greeted get again by his face. Typing away on his computer. Probably writing about how bored he is. I’m stationed in a booth with a coffee and a donut in my hand looking at my girl best friend. Luke will always hold a place in my heart, even though he’s incredibly straight and incredibly loud that he is straight. Ever make is, unless they aren’t. Unless they’re gay.
Coffee boys backing up when Abby looks at me.
“He's not-“ I say blushing a little from the embarrassment. “He's not. Nope”  
“Come on he’s screening homo” she says and it makes me blush even more.
“I mean I don’t look like a homo and here we are.” I say laughing but there’s a hint of truth in it.
“yeah but you’ve got the typical dude style.” She says and I nod in agreement.
“Have you talked to Clint lately?” I ask. Staring into my cup of coffee.
“Yeah why?”
“No reason I’m just curious” I haven’t talked to him in weeks, ever since I. Then it hits me. Ever since I came out he’s been ignoring me. “He’s ignoring me” I say and Drink my coffee to avoid conversation.
“Who Clint?” she says “no way.”
“Yes way” I say “ever since I came out.. He’s a homophobe!”
“Or he’s just gay and is trying to hide it from you?” she says and I kinda want that to be true. But I know it’s not.
“speak of the devil” Abby says as Clint walks into the small coffee shop. I turn abruptly and I’m shocked. He’s hotter than ever. God has he been working out? I mean his pecs are huge and his guts smaller. His tree trunk thighs are muscular and large. And his jaws more sharp than it was a few months ago. Also his arms are the size of grapefruit. Absolutely stunning. And I’m caught staring. I look away and I’m blushing.
“Hey, Tommy long time no see!” he says and I can’t help but smile.
“You mind if I sit down here for a bit? I’m waiting for Kelly” he sits down next to Abby and his eyes are the same shade of beautiful blue that I remember them to be. Even if my love for him was a cover up for Luke he’s still hot, and now that Luke’s not gay I can find out if he is. I’m a hopeless romantic. God his hairs even cuter than it has ever been. It’s a mixture of curly and bushy and long and really cute.
“So how’s it been?” I ask to the tall brute of a man.
“Pretty good, I mean I’ve been working out for football so that’s all I’ve been doing lately” he said flexing his giant arm, and it definitely shows. I think.
“oh right, about football. I’m quitting this year. I need to get my grades up for university” I say smiling a little.
“Are you serious? You’re like our best player. Ah oh well” he says and I don’t know if he’s being serious or not.
“Are you serious? You and Alex single handedly could get us to finals easy” I say and Clint and Abby smile and it’s pretty great. He’s blushing “I mean seriously like you’ve never been this fit before, I’m sure we’re fine” I say smiling. God I’m so dumb. Ok so I think I like him even more now. He’s even got a little bit of dark stubble a soft 5 o’clock shadow. I’m glad he’s back.

But man, I wish he was gay.