Both Sides Now.

Chapter 17

A entire month later and I’m sitting in Luke’s basement while a miniature plumber breaks bricks to receive coins and stomps on weird 2 legged gumbas is running around on his TV. I’m eating a bag of chips and wondering what college I should go to. I’m thinking maybe spending a gap year and going to London or going to New York, something like that. I look at Luke who looks happy but behind his face a frown is larger than anything.
“Hey, what’s going on?,” I ask as he straightens out.
“Abby found out.” My gut tightens and I feel my hands shake.
“What?”
“She found out about us” he says “and she broke up with me.” Jesus this is all my fault.
“Oh jeez, I’m sorry” and at that he slams his lips onto me. I give in for a second than push him away.
“I can’t” I say. “I, uh have a boyfriend” my voice shakes and Luke looks miserable.
“Oh,”
“Yeah.” I say and I can practically hear his heart drop.
“Who is it? It’s not Dwight is it?” he asks and I shake my head.
“I can’t say. You know homo stuff” I say and then my phone rings I answer it and it’s a number that I don’t even know. Answering it wearily it’s some lady on the line.
“Is this Tommy Everitt?” she asks and my hands start to shake
“yes?” I respond.
“Dwight Spinner has been in a accident and has been admitted to the hospital”
“Jesus Christ is he ok?”
“We’re not sure yet, he went into a coma and his vitals are stabilized, but you were in his contact information,”
“Ok I’ll be right over” I say hanging up.
“Dwight’s in a coma” I say to Luke who wished he would have swallowed his words.

Speeding to the hospital me and Luke run in to the front desk. The smell of bleach and clean burning my nostrils.
“Someone called me to go see Dwight Spinner, have you tried his parents? They’re probably worried sick” I say to the lady at the front desk.
She writes me a room number on a piece of paper and we head to the 3rd floor my hand is shaking as it holds the piece of paper tight in my fist. Room 314 is on the left and looks busy. We enter and see his parents crying. I step cautiously when his mother catches my eye her eyes are wet and glossy. His father looks more stern than Dwight had described. And Dwight, he had wires coming out of him from everywhere and giant machines breathing for him. He’s grasping for life. He looks dead, pale and still. But he has a heartbeat, a very slow artificial heart beat that’s keeping him alive for the most part. It’s honestly shocking that I’m on his contact information, since I barley know him, only going on one date. He has a cut on his cheek and a black eye. I look at the doctor’s who are working on a machine that I don’t even know the name of and I see his toe twitch.
“we should get Abby here” I whisper
“What no” Luke says and than the doctor speaks.  Words but I’m not paying attention to him because Dwight Spinner a kid who had so much life lays lifeless on fitted thin hospital bed sheets and I wonder what happened.
His mother sobs harder and I wonder if Michael knows, And his father starts to walk towards me.
“This is your fault” he says taking my collar of my shirt and hauling it up close to him. The shirt tight in his fist. “Because you too were having sex this is you’re fault!”
“What?” I blurt out and Luke looks even more disappointed. “No we’re just friends I swear” and I feel him pull away as 2 doctors tare him from me. My collar is pulled and wrinkly but I can hear shouting as Dwight’s mother follows after him.
“You’re dating Dwight?” Luke says and I look at him,
“No. I’m dating Alfie.” The words slide out and it’s a weight off my shoulders.
     “Ok, well do you know why he’s here?”  he asks and I’m thankful that he doesn’t pester me to go on.
“I think he was jumped because he’s gay. By Clint and Alex and well it could have been me too” I say. “If I didn’t quite I would have been there kicking the shit out of him, because maybe I was jealous? That he was aloud to be gay and I couldn’t?” I say sitting in the chair looking at his heart rate.
“Yeah but look at his dad, he was so mad that you were even here, I don’t know something doesn’t add up.”
      “He thinks we’re dating obviously, Dwight musta said something after our date” I say looking at his fingers.
“He can’t die, ok?” whatever happens he can’t.” my voice comes out as cracky and I choke. Than the doctor enters. Doctor Grum
     “He’s going to be fine.” He says and it startles both me and Luke and I feel boneless. “Is he your boyfriend?” I shake my head and he looks at the body of a boy who just wants to live.
“it was a hate crime tho” I say looking up at him
“It was a car crash. He’s lucky he’s alive” I appreciate this man, and I hope he understands what I’m going through. And even though it wasn’t a hate crime on their part I’m just glad he’s ok. “Its late, I’ll let you know if anything happens and you can come down tomorrow” he says and me and Luke both get up my knees feel like led, but I manage to get out of the hospital into the chilly March air I cough a bit as we enter my car Luke looks exhausted, I look exhausted.

Trying to get some sleep a week later I’m greeted by a phone call I look at the caller id and question it for a bit before picking it up.
“Hey” it’s Abby and I’m groggy and I rub my eyes to concentrate better.
“Hey?” I choke out my voice is rough and dry.
“I’m so sorry” she says and I can hear her hold in tears.
“For what? Abby I’m gonna come over if you want me too” I say getting into the sitting position on my bed my polaroid’s spread out on the floor by my closet they catch my eyes as I turn on my lamp.
“Ok yeah” she says and that’s all I need. “Go in through the back tho” I chuckle and hang up grabbing a jacket and pull on some sweats and I check my watch. 11:38 good thing it’s a Saturday. I think creeping down the stairs March break is about to start on Monday and that gives me a week to do nothing except for the fact that Mr Hozier gave us an essay for the end of the year which is going to kill because it’s about our life. Alfie already started his and it’s just sad how Intune with school work he is.
Arriving at Abby’s I sneak in through the back practically climbing into her window. It’s been a while since I’ve seen here. Her wild curly hair is tied back and my sneakers are soaked because I traversed there by foot. I knock on her window as I balance myself on the ladder that she placed there years before. She slides it open and I tumble in. I take my shoes off before entering her pink domain. Her room smells like honey and I can hear backstreet boys playing in the background. She gives me a giant hug and I look at her worried because Abby hates hugs; well for the most part.
“Me and Luke broke up” she says and I hate that he told me first.
“I know, Luke told me.” I say “and for the record we aren’t dating, he’s sorta straight.” I say letting go of her sweet embrace.
“He said he was bi, but he still cheated on me,”
“How’d you find out?” I ask
“He went to a party with clint and got drunk and called me” Jesus Christ I’m not excited to go back and see what Clint has to say to that.
“Abby jeez I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean for any of this to happen, I would never want to hurt you, or anything.” I say and my voice is still horse and rough.
“Tom it’s ok, I’m just with Jen in the hospital you’re the only one I have left”
“Wait Jen’s in the hospital?” I ask and I stutter a bit so it comes out like a scratched record repeating and pausing to get it right.
“Yeah she was admitted a few days ago,” I swear nobody tells me anything. Like I’m on the outside looking in; and there’s so many secrets and lies scattered throughout I gotta come clean.
“Jesus why?” I ask as she lets go of my grasp and rubs her sweaty palms on her pants.
“She tried to hurt herself, so her mom forced her to go in the psychiatric ward, and they won’t let her have visitors so I have no idea if she’s ok or not.” Her voice is rough now and I can hear tears in her throat. “Jesus I’m not crying” she says drying her eyes.
“Oh jeez that’s awful” I say rubbing her back. I hate seeing her like this. All sad and junk she’s supposed to be the positive one consulting everyone else not the other way around.
“Hey do you want some good news?” I ask getting up. “I have a boyfriend.” It feels good to say that. I feel like this is a real pivotal point in my life, first coming out now this I’m on a role.
“Whoa who?” she asks  I bite my tongue.
“I can’t say. But it starts with an A” I say
“Alfie? No Andy?” she guesses and I shouldn’t have given her that guess. But it’s not Andy a nerd in our law class. 
“Yeah it’s Alfie, but don’t tell anyone he’s not out yet,”
“When did y’all get together?”
“New Years.” I say and it’s weird to think but it’s already been 2 months since we’ve been together it feels nice.
“Whoa dude that’s sick,” she says and gives me a hug. I smile, blushing a bit
“But he’s not out, so you can’t tell anyone.” I interject moving away to hum to the tune of I want it that way and I smile softly.

You and me