Both Sides Now.

chapter 14

Opening my front door because of a frantic knock. Luke greets me, bundled up in at least 4 layers running his hands together to produce heat.
“Hey,” he says blowing into his palms
“Hi,” I say looking at him, we haven’t exactly been on speaking terms, so I’m not really sure what he expects me to do, with him greeting me at my doorstep a week before Christmas.
“can I come in?” He asks and I look at him questioning.
“Yeah sure” opening my door more he walks in, to be fair it’s truly chivalrous because Moncton is in the middle of a snowstorm and it looks like it was too bad to drive so, he walked.
He takes a seat in the kitchen, as I place the kettle on a hot boiler. “So uh what’s up?” I asked leaning against the counter.
“I was in the neighbourhood” he responds laughing at his joke.
“Yeah?”
“Nah, I was chilling with Abby, and uh we had this big fight and I just wanted to say I’m sorry, I should have never done that to you it was dumb,” yeah dumb all right.
“That’s it?” I say “you think just because you’re a lukecical and because Abby had a hiccup in the relationship means that you’re obligated to say sorry?”
“yes?” he looks at me. “Uh I mean, remember when we were kids? It was so much simpler then, this is dumb you know?”
“You have a point I forgive you, but only because I miss our childhood shenanigans”
“Yeah?” he says mocking me
“Yeah actually” I say as the high pitched scream of the kettle pierced our ears. Taking it off the burner I pour steaming water into two separate mugs and put chocolate power in each stirring it until it’s dissolved, handing it to Luke he blows on it before taking a gulp. “Well you can’t go home, I’ll fix you a bed,”
“Uh yeah,”  he says and we move to my bedroom.

As we enter my room he takes off the sweater he was wearing and launches it at my face, it smells like him, like cologne and fresh wood, and it makes me want him just a little more.
“What was that for?” I ask throwing the manly smelling sweater back at him he’s wearing a white tee shirt and I love him, I really do.

“So, ok you’re gay! When did that happen?” he asked several hours later into the night. Both drunk off sleepiness.
“Uh, I don’t know, it was subtle things scattered around, and it didn’t really click until I saw you wow that’s really weird, uh yeah It was one late night when we were sleeping over together and you took your shirt off or something, but I- I knew then.” I say. “Like Luke Skywalker helped and I feel like everything fell into place right then and there”
“Yeah. I think I blew up at you because of what you said, that I was into you, because I think it might be true? I don’t know I love Abby, like a whole bunch and I really think I can marry her one day, but the Thought of us together makes me feel weird, but in a good way you know?” he says and I face him. Eye to eye, everything is falling into place, I thought I was over him, but here we are. Our lips finally interlock and I close my eyes. Everything feels so right, but so wrong at the same time, and we both pull away at the same time.
“This is wrong dude,” Luke says under his breath.
“Yeah it is” I say
“Fuck it” he says kissing me again “after tonight we never talk about this again ok?” Luke says in-between bated breaths as he kisses me with urgency. He’s taking his shirt off and I’m already shirtless for some weird reason.
“Did you bring condoms?” I ask pulling away.
“Uh yeah they’re in my pants,” he says reaching to grab them. Oh my god this is happening. I’m not going to be a virgin in an hour. Am I ready? Nope, definitely not. He’s hard, and so am I, and he’s only in his underwear, and I’m in jeans, but I’m currently unbuttoning them and I feel absolutely on top of the world. His hand is brushing every part of me, reaching down, and all I can do is hope it never ends.

Waking up at 8 am I’m greeted with Luke cuddling me, and I’m completely naked. What the fuck happened last night? I think getting out of bed and throwing on a pair of clean underwear. I’ll let Luke sleep a bit more, but holy shit that felt good. And part of me feels absolutely awful because Luke’s taken, but I’m glad he got the whole sexuality thing sorted out. I love him so freaking much, but I think this is a one night stand thing. And I want him really bad.
Eating cereal out of a bowl in the kitchen my mom walks into the hard cold tile floors.
“Hey sleepy bones” she says opening the fridge
“Hi, uh Luke slept over the storm was really bad”
“Oh yeah no problem is he awake yet?”
“Uh no we stayed up late” I say finishing my bowl.
Heading back upstairs I open my door to see Luke sitting on the edge of my bed. He’s rubbing his eyes and looking exhausted.
“Hey” I say sitting next to him, he looks at my blue eyes and smiles
“hey” he says and his lips look delicious, almost dream like.
“How’d you sleep?”
“Same as always, you?” he said getting up.
“Good, good. Uh last night was” i say as I get up to follow him
“Amazing” he finishes my sentence and i'm happy he feels the same way “but it was a mistake” he says throwing on his shirt.
“It doesn’t have to be” I say
“But it does Tom, we’re not meant to be I’m with Abby”
“Yeah” I say a little disappointed. “Um whenever you’re ready I can make you some breakfast if you want”
“Actually I was about to leave, but uh yeah thanks” he says smiling a bit.
“Right listen can we talk about what happened for a second?”
“Uh not really no” he says throwing on his wood smelling sweater.
“Luke I’m not going to say this again we gotta talk about it because this is the last chance to” I say
“Fine, but make it quick Abby wanted to talk about something at the cold brew” he says
“Last night was amazing and you’re with Abby so I’m ok with what’s about to happen, but know you’re my best friend and I feel like this brought us closer together” I say “do you think you’re bi? Or something like that”
“I guess uh I don’t know I think so. Anyways  come to the cold brew with me I miss the three of us hanging out” he says and I feel on top of the world.
Opening my front door me and David go out into the snow laden area my dad had shoveled our driveway before work and the plows had since ridden the streets of the white fluffy yet dense snow
“We should probably take the car right?” I ask standing looking at Luke starting to slide down the cracked driveway.
“Uh yeah good idea” he says easing himself towards the car. First of all it’s covered in snow so after me and him rid the automobile of snow I start to scrape the windows getting rid of pesky frost. As I do this Luke gets into the driver’s side and starts the car heating it up for us.
Getting in I start rubbing my hands through fingerless gloves to produce heat. I take of my scarf and shove it into a cup holder. Pulling out of the driveway I head to our signature coffee shop. It’s nothing big and it’s definitely not popular on days like this, but it’s my favorite place and I'm happy to spend it with them. My mind going busy for a split second before reaching a stop skidding a bit because of the ice I continue forward into the cold brews parking lot. Abby sits in a booth drinking something hot  little does she know that me and her boyfriend had amazing sex, amazing gay sex for a matter of fact and she’s clueless to it all.
“Hey,” she says smiling as me and him get into separate sides he sits next to her and he greets Abby by kissing her cheek. My side of the bench is empty and I don’t want it to be. Jesus im pathetic. I think as the waiter wonders towards us, it’s that extremely hot Barista that I can’t remember what his name is for the life of me. But I think his name’s Anthony? I don’t know he isn’t wearing his name tag but I know his face and he smiles when he asks what I wanted.
“Oh uh hey, I’ll have a hot chocolate and uh some hash browns” I say smiling back “maybe some eggs too” he takes the menu that was placed on the table.
“Uh yeah sure no problem” he says and disappears into the kitchen and my heart is a thousand miles from my body. I look at Luke and he laughs a bit
“Come on, him?” he says and I begin to blush.
“I mean maybe?” but no coffee boy. Alfie freaking Jones is someone who has my heart and so does Luke.
The barista comes back with everyone’s food Abby ordered a whole English breakfast eggs bacon toast the fix. Luke ordered a bowl of oatmeal with a black coffee. And well my eggs and hash browns turns into a whole breakfast as well. toast and bacon being added to the mix.
“I uh-I didn’t order all this” I say chuckling.
“You didn’t? Well it’s already here uh I won’t charge you just take it as a Christmas gift” he says and I’m blushing hard core. Absolutely caught up in his eyes. Beautiful brown eyes. He looks absolutely amazing
“Oh ok thanks” my heart’s racing and Abby and Luke look amazed.
“Did that guy just hit on you?”
“He did” I say looking at my plate of food. Holy shit. Holy fucking shit.
Fuck mystery man you’re amazing at your job!