Gold

{19}

The world around Taehyung seemed to disappear into nothing. As if the oxygen in his lungs was being sucked out of him. Almost as if a force was continuously choking him with great pressure.

In other words, he felt suffocation.

The panicked look in Jisoo's eyes when he joined their lips still tore him to pieces. He thought Jisoo gave him enough signals and alarms for him to make a move on his own. Was he not good enough for a social butterfly like her? Was he not good looking? Or did he have too much of his own to handle her weight on his lumped shoulders?

Not that he bothered, she was the remedy he needed for breathing. She was more than just a crush.

He had these emotions stirring up inside him as he unpacked his stuff after reaching his dorm. Where he belonged. Not at a girl's place. He was being way too dependant on other people. He needed to get himself back on track.

He lost his grip on his thoughts when Jungkook stood near his door, an awkward smile on his face. "Hey."

"Hi," Taehyung replied.

Jungkook gulped, not sure how to approach Taehyung and apologize for his mistakes.

As Taehyung's eyes continued examining his stuff, Jungkook wondered why he came alone, at 2:37 in the morning. Or night. However you put it. It irked him how Jisoo wasn't with him.

But the stressed look on his face made it rather hard for Jungkook to stir up small talk. He looked rather disturbed, which he always was, right now.

Jungkook leaned against the door frame and cleared his throat, catching a glimpse from Taehyung's eyes. "I'll get coffee, if you want me to."

"You're not supposed to take in caffeine right before you're about to sleep, I thought you knew better."

Jungkook winced at how straightforward he was being, without even lifting his head to throw a bored glance at Jungkook. He decided to leave him to be and then make proper breakfast in the morning as an apology for, well, everything.

"Good night."

☣☣☣

Taehyung woke up to the sound of pots and pans clicking. He felt like a needle was being stabbed in his eardrum. He didn't like loud voices in the morning. Especially since he had a rough previous night.

Jungkook peeped from the door, sticking his head out and looking at Taehyung with apologetic eyes for the noise, his lips moved and he spoke, "M-morning, I made sorry excuse of a breakfast. You're most welcome to join," he finished with a nervous chuckle.

Taehyung cocked a brow, "The great Jungkook is stuttering?"

"Well I guess, when your best friend seems like he could replace the US Marines with his single stare, it's hard not to screw up words or actions," he shrugged.

Taehyung narrowed his eyes, "Am I being a little too... cold?"

Jungkook shook his head, "We'll talk about that later, come get breakfast first. I made it just like Jis-" he stopped half sentence, realizing it's not convenient to bring her up after Taehyung had the sudden urge to leave her house at midnight.

"Breakfast, right." Taehyung dodged her name and went to the bathroom.

☣☣☣

"Please, eat something!"

Lisa's voice pierced through the air, screeching her nails on the plate to grab Jisoo's attention. Jisoo had been zoned out for a while now. Being absolutely absent in all aspects.

Lisa sighed, plopping down on the couch, mouthing 'i give up'. Her intentions were desperately wanting Jisoo to function. Which Jisoo was not capable of doing. Lisa gazed at Jisoo who was lost in thought on her chair. Her head hung down low, shoulders lump and a bunch of wrinkles on her face. She had no sleep in her.

Lisa sighed, getting up from her seat and strutting towards Jisoo. Crouching down on the floor so that she could look up at Jisoo, she started, "You're always thinking about other people, it's time you spare some time for yourself. If he can't understand your place and what you've been through, he doesn't deserve you as a muse. Sure, he might have been your sweetest downfall but you can't let humanity win this once, you're a human too you know," her voice seemed to fade into a soundless whisper at the end.

Jisoo looked at Lisa, her eyes emotionless and blank. She wasn't her cheery i-will-spread-happiness-wherever-i-go self. Instead, she was almost like her older sister.

Jisoo winced when she recalled the events of that night, not wanting to be enveloped in them but at the same time wanting to be the center of the whole situation. It pretty much revolved around her. She couldn't pass it on to anyone.

"You almost look like your older sister." Lisa whispered.

"Thanks, genes work sometimes."

Lisa shook her head, leaning against the chair Jisoo was sitting on, turning her back to her. "Look at yourself. You're in no place of acting all tough and macho, Jisoo."

Jisoo ignored her comment, knowing damn well it was true from the deepest of roots. She didn't like being weak, she didn't like being looked down upon.

"Stop pushing yourself to be strong all the time." Lisa said.

Jisoo whispered, "I can't let what happened to my sister happen to me or anyone."

Lisa smiled, "I hope you were blissfully aware that you are currently in her situation."

Jisoo looked at Lisa from above, placing a hand on her head and ruffling her hair out of habit. Jisoo's skin was as pale as the snow, her fingers cold under touch. The brown hair on her head in a hot looking mess, being tangled from various sides and not brushed. Split ends started to get under work. Her eye bags clearly showcasing how tired she has been for the past week, getting no sleep.

The night Taehyung left, Jisoo was absolutely broken. She wanted him to talk things out, to be there for her.

She just wanted him so badly that she had to stop outside his house for a whole hour, without knocking.

Jisoo fell in love with him. More like crashed.

But why was she not reaching out to him and confessing her feelings? Knowing he had them too? That she wanted him as badly as he wanted her?

Because he was with another woman.