We got back in New York around 1 am. Breckyn slept through the whole flight and the ride home from the airport. I texted Nancy when we landed to let her know that we were back in town safe and to give Winnie a kiss goodnight for me. I missed my baby girl so much. I havent gotten to see her in about two weeks and I was aching to see her and play with her, to hear her laugh. I couldn't believe that in a short time, I would have another little Fallon running around with her. She was going to be such a good big sister. I couldn't help but have the biggest smile on my face. Everything in my life was turning around for the best.
I have this amazing show that I never ever thought I would have in my life. I mean, SNL was the dream. I did that, after I left SNL I expected to be done with all of this showbiz stuff and you know what? I was perfectly fine with that. Now, I have the Tonight Show. I mean, the TONIGHT SHOW! Jesus, That's crazy. I laughed to myself as I pulled into the driveway of the house. Now, I have this beautiful daughter, I have a great support system, the best friends a guy could ever ask for, and if it was possible, the best ex wife a man could ever ask for, even though Nancy is much more than that to me. She's truly a god send. I don't know if I could have done the same thing if I found out that not only was she dating someone who was, a fan, first and foremost, but that they were pregnant together? Honestly. I don't know how I would take that, but she's just been amazing with Breckyn and me, and now the baby. I couldn't be happier. Plus, I have this amazing woman who takes my breath away on a daily basis and she doesn't even know that. If she does know it, she denies it. How can she not see just how incredible she really is? AND I'm having a child with her? This was nuts, man.
I shook my head and laughed at my life. I shut the truck off and just sat there for a second and thought about all this. I looked over at Breckyn peacefully sleeping and grinned. I put my hand on her stomach and closed my eyes. "God, I don't really know what I did to deserve all of this in my life, but I will NOT be taking this for granted. Thank you for bringing the girl into my life and letting her fall for me. Thank you for putting me in the right place at the right time. Thank you for saving her and for saving me. Most of all, thank you for blessing us with this child. I pray that everything is happy and healthy in there. If there is anything I can take from all this, It would be Breckyn and this child, and Winnie. You can take everything else away from me if you want. I hope you don't. But as long as you leave me with them, I would be perfectly okay and I'll spend everyday making sure they know that. Thank you for everything." I whispered. I leaned down and kissed her belly and then got out of my side of the truck. I walked over to her side of the truck and opened her door. I gently undid her seatbelt and lifted her into my arms. She sleepily wrapped her arms around my neck and snuggled her nose into my collarbone. "Where are we?" she mumbled. I chuckled.
"We are home, sleepy girl. Shhhh... go back to sleep." I gently put her head back on my shoulder as she tried to lift it. I walked up the steps with her in my arms and shifted her into my left arm and used my right arm to get my house keys out of my pocket. I opened the door and took Breckyn back into both of my arms and carried her to my bedroom. Correction, OUR bedroom. I opened our door and gently placed her into the bed. I pulled her jeans off and grabbed a pair of my shorts out of my side of the drawer and put them on her. I left her black v neck on. I stood back and looked at her as she stole one of my pillows and snuggled it to her body. I laughed. She stole my pillows at least once every night.
"Beautiful.." I whispered to myself and I turned to walk into the master bathroom. I rubbed my eyes and pulled my phone out of my pocket. 2:30 in the morning. That alarm was going to piss me off tomorrow. I knew that much. I ran my hand through my hair and sighed. I decided a shower could wait until tomorrow morning. I'll need something to wake me up anyways as it is. I brushed my teeth and threw my button up off and into the hamper. I shimmied my jeans off and kicked them into the hamper as well. I walked back into our bedroom and watched as Breckyn drooled onto my pillow. I let out a quick laugh.. "Yeah, you can keep that pillow tonight, babe." I said to myself. She was so cute when she was sleeping, drool and all. Most people would get grossed out at that, but if she can put up with my flinching in the middle of the night, then I can handle a little drool.
I walked into the kitchen and grabbed a ginger ale, a glass of water, and some crackers and put them on the night stand next to Breckyn with a small wastebasket, just in case she woke up sick again. I put a couple of her hair bands she had strewn around the room on my wrist, so I could put her hair up if she needed it. I also put a heating pad and mints next to the bed if she wanted it. I sat on my side of the bed and stretched, then set the alarm for 8 am. 6 hours sleep, if Breckyn didn't get up and get sick. I was going to hate myself in the morning. I heard Breckyn start snoring and smiled to myself. I laid down and turned off the light and put my arm over my eyes. I stole some covers back from Breck and relaxed. I immediately felt Breckyn wrap her arms around me. "So worth it though.." I said outloud to myself. I started to drift off and felt myself flinch.. Then I was out.
*************
BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP
"Ugh.." I muttered to myself as I reached over and turned the alarm off. That's when I feel the bed bouncing up and down.
"WAKE UP WAKE UP WAKE UP WAKE UP!" I open my eyes and look up. Breckyn is dancing around above me. "You gotta get up and get ready to go to the studio PLUS we've got a baby appointment today!" She continued dancing above me as I rolled back over on my back. I grabbed her wrist and pulled her down on top of me. She straddled my waist and laughed at me. "That's RIGHT.. We do have a baby appointment today!" I said as I grabbed her neck and pulled her in for a kiss. Her hair fell around my face and tickled my neck.
It had been two weeks since we got back from her parents. The first couple of weeks back to the show went well. We have had great guests and great ratings. We even brought back The Real Housewives of the Tonight Show and the video went viral in an hour after posting. We've still got a steady following with the show and our ratings are still on top compared to other late night shows. Things were still going well for us, even after almost a year of the show starting. Tonight wasn't going to be any different. We had some great guests and a special musical performance that I was keeping under wraps. It was going to be so rad. But, I was more excited about our baby appointment today. Nancy had called me the week we got back and gave me the number for the doctor we had been seeing before we had Winnie. She could finally fit us into her busy schedule today. I was going to skip lunch to be there with Breck but if everything was happy and healthy, it was worth it.
"So is it a good baby day or a bad baby day? " I asked as I got out of bed and rubbed the sleep from my face. I stood up and stretched, bending over my feet and swinging to either side. "It is a GREAT day!" She said as jumped off the bed and tackled me back on to the bed. I laughed and pushed her hair out of her face and behind her ears. "I can see that! That's awesome babe!" I ran my hands down her back and brought them to a rest on her hips. She was wearing one of my plaid shirts and my shorts, which was her nightly routine for bed now. I didn't mind at all though. I unbuttoned the last three buttons on my shirt and pulled the sides back to show her tiny, but slowly rounding abdomen. "You look amazing in my clothes, babe." I let out in a low murmur. She pulled the sides back in. "it's the only thing that I feel comfortable in. Don't make fun of me." I pulled the sides back and kissed her belly. "I'm not. I mean it, you look good. You're starting to show a tiny bit. That makes it even better." She looked down and rubbed the belly. "You should get up. You need to get ready." She jumped off and walked out of the room and into the kitchen. "Ugh, be still my heart." I grabbed my heart and walked out of the room after her. "I heard that." she called out to me. "I said it loud enough so you could!" I called back and walked into Winnie's room. She was sleeping peacefully in her bed. I reached down and put my hand on her back and rubbed it. "Hey pretty girl, its time to get up." I whispered in her ear. She started to turn in her bed and she slowly fluttered her eyes open. "Hey Winnie Rose! Good morning!" I said in my baby voice. She brought her little hand up to her eyes and rubbed them. She rolled over and smiled. "Daddy.." she said sleepily. She brought her tiny hand up and grabbed my fingers and then she held her arms out. "Hey baby girl!" I said as I picked her up and held her on my side. "Are you ready to go to Mommy's today?" She shook her head "Yuuuuh." I laughed at her and put her on my shoulders. "Let's eat and then we can get ready!" She giggled as I skipped out of the room and into the kitchen. "BWECKS!" Winnie shouted at Breckyn. She was playing with my hair and tugging on it, like she always did. Breckyn looked up from making a bagel and smiled. "Well, hello, pretty lady! How are you today?" She said as she walked up to me an Winnie. "Gooooooooood." Winnie said as she leaned over my side and held her hands out to Breckyn. Breckyn smiled and took her from me. "That's what I like to hear!" She bounced up and down with Winnie and pointed over to the counter. "I made you breakfast, but you should probably get ready soon, you have about 30 minutes to get showered, dressed, and fed before Nancy gets here." She said as Winnie played with the buttons on my shirt that she was wearing. "Plus, I need to get this little girl ready for her momma!" Breckyn swung Winnie from side to side and made her go into a giggle fit. "Thank you honey!" I said as I grabbed the bagel and took a bite. I leaned down and gave Breckyn a kiss and then turned to Winnie. "Can Daddy steal a kiss?" I said as I puckered my lips towards her. Winnie smiled and grabbed my face, kissing me on the lips. "Wuv wooo." She said. "Aww, I love you too baby girl!" I said as I began to back up. Breckyn laughed and Winnie turned to her. "wuv woo Bwecks" Winnie reached up and kissed Breckyn on the cheek.
I stopped what I was doing and stared. Breckyn stared at me. "She's never done that before." Breckyn said, slowly. I almost dropped my bagel.. I put my hand to my chest. "Noooo.. She hasn't." Winnie looked at me with a smile and giggled. She turned back and put her little hand on Breckyns face and pulled hers towards her face. "Wuv. Woo." she said patting Breckyns face gently. Breckyn had tears in her eyes and pulled Winnie into her chest. "I love you too, Winnie." Breckyn kissed the top of her head and started to cry. I walked up and pulled both of them into my chest and let some tears fall myself. I cant believe it. This was such a good thing. "I cant tell you how happy this makes me." I whispered into Breckyn's hair. She pulled back and started bouncing Winnie up and down again, getting her to giggle. I wiped the tears from her eyes. "You have no idea how happy I am." she said. I smiled.
"Go! Get ready! We have plenty of time to do this. You got to get ready, James!" She said. I quickly turned around and threw the bagel in my mouth as I ran back to the shower. I quickly got ready and dressed and let Breckyn take her shower. I played with Winnie in the living room for a while until I heard a knock on the door. "MOMMYS HERE!" I squealed as I picked her up and her bag. I put Winnie on my shoulders and she grabbed a hold of my hair. I bounced all the way to the door, getting her to laugh on every bounce. I opened the door and Nancy smiled at us. "Well, hello my crazy girl!" She said as Winnie reached for her. I bent down and Nancy lifted her off my shoulders. "Hello, to you too, Jim." She said as she kissed my cheek. "You look like you're in a great mood today." She put Winnie on her hip and I handed her the bag as we walked to her car. "Well, today's a good day Nance, Breckyn is feeling good, I am feeling good, its gonna be a good show tonight and we've got the baby appointment today." I said as I helped her put Winnie into her carseat. I buckled Win in and gave her a kiss. "Daddy loves you." She smiled and pat my cheek. "Wuv woo Daddy."
I closed the door. "Well, let me know what the doctor says. I hope all goes well for you guys." She said as she walked around to her side of the car. "Thank you, Nance. That means a lot that you're cool about this. But, I have one more thing to tell you." I said as I shuffled my feet. I don't know how she was going to respond to Winnie telling Breckyn she loved her, but she needs to know.
Nancy shut her door again and walked up to me. "Oh gosh, this is never good. What is it now?" She said as she leaned against the car. I did the same thing. "Well, this morning, Breckyn and I were in the kitchen with Winnie and I leaned down and gave Winnie a kiss and she told me she loved me, like she always does. But then she turned to Breckyn and told her she loved her too and kissed her. Twice." I looked up at Nance at the last part and searched her face. Would she be happy? Mad? Sad? Nancy looked up from the ground and looked me in the eyes. "And?" she said. I looked at her confused. "I just thought you should know. I didn't want you to hear it without me telling you. I just thought you could prepare yourself or something." Nancy laughed. "You think I didn't expect this to happen? Jimmy, you've been with Breckyn for almost a year now. You live together. She's pregnant with your child. I'm not too naïve to think that you nor Winnie love Breckyn. Hell, I love Breckyn. She's good for you and she's amazing with Winnie. I expected this to happen sooner or later. I don't mind that Winnie loves Breckyn. If I got to handpick the future stepmother to my child, I couldn't have picked a better one myself, James." She put her hand up to my face and lightly smacked it, a love tap. She used to do that all the time. "That's cute though that you worried about me."
"I just wanted to make sure." I said. She reached up and hugged me. "Im happy for you guys. Really, I am. You two make a great couple. You're soul mates. I believe that. You should relax. You have my blessing. Not that you need it." I hugged her back and looked up. Breckyn was standing in the doorway. Nancy let go and looked at her. "Good luck at your appointment! I hope everything goes well!" She waved at Breckyn. Breckyn walked down towards us and put her hand around me. "Thanks, Nancy." Nancy got in her car and drove away. I waved at Winnie and we turned to go back into the house.
"What was that all about?" Breckyn asked as I walked back into the house to grab my briefcase and keys. "What do you mean?" I asked as I walked to the door. "You and Nancy, out there. Hugging, talking." I chuckled and put my hand on her face. "Oh, that? I told her how Winnie told you she loved you. I was worried she would be upset."
"Oh. Okay." Breckyn said. It seemed like something else was bothering her but I decided to let it go for now. I gave her a kiss and walked back towards the door. "You'll come by my office at around 11 right?" I said as she walked up to me. "Yes, I will." I gave her a quick peck on the cheek. "See you then beautiful." I waved and smiled as I walked out of the door and into the truck. I turned on the track that was going to be performed tonight and listened to it on repeat. I loved this song. Couldn't wait to have it on the show tonight. People were going to go nuts.
***************
I had my earbuds in my ears and my eyes closed when I felt my office chair dip back. I flung my arms and legs out trying to steady myself from falling. I opened my eyes and looked up. Breckyn was laughing her ass off.
"Jesus Christ, honey! You scared the shit out of me!" I said as I stood up and straightened my tie and shirt and caught my breath. I took out my earbuds and looked at her. She was still laughing hysterically. "I'm sorry, but you were in the zone. I didn't want to disturb you by knocking." I helped her off the ground and gave her a kiss. "So you decided a heart attack would be better. Nice." I grabbed my wallet off the desk and whipped my suit jacket on. "You ready?" I said as I walked out the door behind her. "As ready as I'll ever be." she said as we reached the envelope. "It's not going to be that bad. They are just going to do a sonogram and take some blood. Things like that. Maybe we will get a picture today." I smiled as we walked out of the halls of 30 Rock and into the parking lot. "Ugh, I hate giving blood, I get queasy." I helped her into the truck and walked over to my side.
"Don't worry about it, its only a couple vials and then they will be done. Plus, we get to see our baby!" I said excitedly. "Don't forget to ask her about home remedies for the morning sickness or for medicine." She nodded as we drove to the doctors office. We pulled up and I helped her out of the car. She took a deep breath in and out. "Lets go see our baby." I said, trying to ease her nerves.
******************
WHOMP WHOMP WHOMP WHOMP WHOMP.
"Well, Mr. and Mrs. Fallon, there is the heartbeat. Its 171 beat per minute. A strong heartbeat. Everything looks good, here. You look to be around 13 weeks along. That's your baby right there." She pointed to the monitor. I was holding Breckyn's hand and watching the monitor until she said "Mr. and Mrs. Fallon" and then I looked down at Breckyn and smiled. She shot me a look and cleared her throat. "Actually, we are not married, but thank you." Breckyn said, laughing. The doctor cleared her throat. "That's right, sorry. I was just used to saying that I guess... sorry! Anyways, would you like a picture of your baby?" I looked down at the floor, embarrassed. I guess the last time I saw her I WAS with Nancy. This was awkward. "Yes, please, we would like a picture. A couple... actually. If you can do that." I said, looking down at Breckyn, who was smiling. She printed off a few pictures and handed them to us. "Like, I said, everything looks great and the baby looks healthy. I would like to see you in a few weeks, just to make sure that everything is still going well. Breckyn's case is a rare one with her conceiving with so much scar tissue present, I would just like to keep a close watch on this pregnancy so we can stay on the right course." Breckyn nodded. "We can make an appointment today if that is possible." She said, looking up at me. I nodded. "I can let Miles and Higgins and Lorne know so we can keep the schedule cleared of any big events." I said. "No problem, you can go ahead and get dressed and go up to the receptionist and schedule your next appointment. I'll see you guys then! Congratulations!" She said as she shook our hands and closed the door behind her.
"You were right. She is a great doctor." Breckyn said after we had finished up with the receptionist. I put the next appointment in my calendar and walked Breckyn to the truck. "Yeah, I'm sorry about that whole Mr. and Mrs. Fallon thing. I forgot that she was used to Nancy. I hope you didn't feel weird in there. We can change doctors if you want." I said, nervously.
Breckyn looked at me as she reached the truck door. I opened her door and she got in. "Are you kidding me? She's amazing! It was awkward, yeah, but to be quite honest I kind of expected it since the last time she saw you, you were with Nancy. Its not a big deal. People just have to get used to me is all." She smiled at me.
"Well, lets have a look at our first baby picture, shall we?" I said as we drove off. Breckyn pulled the copies out of her purse and looked at it. "Its so weird that this little thing is growing in me." she said after we looked at it for a while. "I think its beautiful and so are you." I said, rubbing her hand with my thumb. Breckyn handed me a copy. "She gave us three. I'll put one in the house and you can have this one, if you want, but I don't know what to do with the third." she said. I smiled at her.
"I have the perfect idea for the third one." I said as she put them back in her purse. "This one is going in the office though, right next to Winnie's picture for now." We pulled back into the parking lot of 30 Rock and Breckyn jumped out of the truck. "What do you mean you know what youre doing with the third one?" she said, looking at my suspiciously.
"Oh, you'll see. I'll tell you tonight after the show. Are you coming up to watch rehearsal and the show or do you want to head home?" I asked as I locked the truck up, holding the sonogram in my hands. Breckyn looked around. "If you don't mind, I think I am going to go home and unpack all my stuff that Mom and Dad sent to me. Its been sitting in the house for two weeks. It needs to get done sometime. Might as well do it tonight." She said. I walked up to her and hugged her. "Alright, but we are watching the show tonight. Its gonna be a good one, and I want you to see this thing I'm doing." I smiled. She laughed. "Alright, Fallon, we can watch it tonight when you get home. Have a fun show." She said as she walked over to her car.
"I always do, don't I?" I teased as I backed up on my way to 30 Rock. "Hey, Breckyn!" I called to her. She turned around. "I love you!" I shouted. "I love you too you big dork!" she laughed as she got in the car and drove away.
************
The show was going great. The monologue was perfect, every joke got a huge laugh, me and Higgins had some great banter, even had Tariq and Questo join in. The night couldn't have been going smoother. But now came the best part, but I couldn't shake the nerves.
JUST BREATHE FALLON. JUST BREATHE. You've done this before, you can do it again. Just breathe, don't forget the words, and don't turn into a sweaty dough ball out there. I said to myself right before we came back from commercial break. The roots were finishing their song and the camera panned back to me. I pointed to the camera and clapped my hands.
"Heyyyy, welcome back! This is the best part of my night, everybody. We have a special treat for you, tonight. This guy is the best and we just love him around here. In the middle of a crazy tour, here he is, performing his massive hit "The Man" which you can purchase on iTunes right now, Aloe Blacc.
The camera turned away from me and onto Aloe. "Hey, I want to just say thank you to Jimmy Fallon for having me on the show tonight and to my fans! But I heard this guy singing my song tonight so I would actually like the real MAN Jimmy to come up here and perform with me! Come on Jimmy!"
I took a deep breath and grabbed a mic from next to my desk and walked up to Aloe. Here goes nothing. I thought as the Roots started playing the intro. Aloe started dancing and riffin with the Roots. He turned to me and started singing.
You can tell everybody
Yeah you can tell everybody
Go ahead and tell everybody
Im the man, Im the man, Im the man.
Yes I am, Yes I am, Yes I am.
I'm the man, I'm the man. I'm the man.
I danced and clapped along with the beat with him as he started rapping.
I believe every lie that I ever told
Paid for every heart that I ever stole
I played my cards and I didn't fold
But it aint that hard when you got soul.
This is my world!
My turn.
Somewhere I heard that life is a test
Ive been through the worst, but I still give my best.
God made my mold different from the rest, then he broke that mold so I know I'm blessed.
Stand up now and face the sun
Won't hide my tail or turn and run
It's time to do what must be done
Be a king when kingdom comes
I loosened up and took off my jacket and rolled up my sleeves as I sang. Aloe laughed and clapped at me. "GO JIMMY" he said as I sang.
Well you can tell everybody
Yeah you can tell everybody
Go ahead and tell everybody
I'm the man, I'm the man, I'm the man
Well you can tell everybody
Yeah you can tell everybody
Go ahead and tell everybody
I'm the man, I'm the man, I'm the man
Yes I am, yes I am, yes I am
I'm the man, I'm the man, I'm the man
I clapped my chest with my hands and put my hands in the air.
Aloe took this verse back and did his thing. I went up to Quest's drumset and took a stick and started playing with him.
I got all the answers to your questions
I'll be the teacher you can be the lesson
I'll be the preacher you be the confession
I'll be the quick relief to all your stressin'
It's a thin line between love and hate
Is you really real or is you really fake
I'm a soldier standing on my feet
No surrender and I won't retreat
THIS IS MY WORLD!
Aloe came up beside me and we walked back down to the stage floor and up into the crowd and we both finished the song.
Stand up now and face the sun
Won't hide my tail or turn and run
It's time to do what must be done
Be a king when kingdom comes
Well you can tell everybody
Yeah you can tell everybody
Go ahead and tell everybody
I'm the man, I'm the man, I'm the man
Well you can tell everybody
Yeah you can tell everybody
Go ahead and tell everybody
I'm the man, I'm the man, I'm the man
Yes I am, yes I am, yes I am
I'm the man, I'm the man, I'm the man
I'm the man
Go ahead and tell everybody what I'm saying y'all
I'm the man
Go ahead and tell everybody what I'm saying y'all
Well you can tell everybody
Yeah you can tell everybody
Go ahead and tell everybody
I'm the man, I'm the man, I'm the man
Well you can tell everybody
Yeah you can tell everybody
Go ahead and tell everybody
I'm the man, I'm the man, I'm the man
Yes I am, yes I am, yes I am
I'm the man, I'm the man, I'm the man
"OH MY GOSH! ALOE BLACC EVERYBODY! THE ROOTS!" I said as I pointed to Aloe and the Roots side of the studio. "THE MAN JIMMY FALLON!" Aloe yelled into his mike, pointing at me. "We'll be right back! Come on BACK!" I said as we panned to commercial.
*************
After we finished taping and everyone congratulated me on the song, I went back to the house. I walked up to the house with a huge smile on my face. I couldn't wait for Breckyn to see that song tonight. She would get a huge kick out of it. Today was such a good day! I couldn't believe it. I opened the door and threw my keys on the table next to the door and sat my briefcase on the floor. I walked through the house, there was dinner on the stove and a beer on the counter for me. I smiled and loosened my tie. "Breckyn? Where are you babe?" I said as I looked through the house.
"In the bedroom." I heard her say. Weird. She didn't sound too excited. Must be feeling sick or something. I grabbed some crackers and a sprite for her before walking into our bedroom. I walked in and threw my tie on the bed. What I saw though, took all the happiness off my face. Breckyn was sitting on our bed with a box on its side, with pictures of me and Nancy spilling out, along with a few letters I had written, and my wedding band. I put the sprite down and looked at her. "What's all that out for?" I asked. I heard thunder roll above our heads as it started pouring outside.
"I need you to tell me the truth, James." I heard her whisper. And with a crack of lightning, the room went pitch black.
Correction, today WAS a good day.
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Bad Luck or Fate?
FanfictionBreckyn Jones travels to New York to getaway from her past. Little does she know she's about to find her future.
