Mental-Taekook

~12~

~Taehyung~

I dont understand how im feeling, you lying down in the backseats of the car asleep, parked next to the beach, as the sunsets, the sun setting is my most humane time in a way, my mother was always with me on a sunset, it was always very cliche.

Never been one for clichés very boring, normal.

You make it bearable though just like she did, and I'm confused by that, I hate being confused, dumb people get confused, I'm not dumb.

I won't allow it.

I'm Kim Taehyung, no one can be smarter than me, no one, my intelligence is the one thing people cannot compare me on, I know everything I need to know,

My mind is a maze that only I can understand, and I like it that way, but Jungkook has came and tried to solve the maze, and he's close to the middle and I don't trust it,

I've been called a lot of things, but it only truly hurt when Jungkook called me any of it.

I haven't felt true pain in a long time, and a part of me knows Jungkook is going to bring it.

He looks so peaceful asleep, his porcine-like skin soft, with cute little pink lips dying to be touched again, but I can't do it, I can't get hurt again, it shows I'm weak.

I can't be weak, I'm not weak love is weakness I can't fall for him, I can't fall for anyone, I need to prove I'm strong I need to prove it, staying with him is only going to hurt me, so what do I do? Leave the car? Have him wake up to no one, nothing, just an empty car no note.

I want to do it, but my last shred of humanity is telling me no, my last part of my heart,

why is it so hard for me to just open up this door and run, I wouldn't even have to run, by the time he woke up just by walking I'd be long gone, running away is something no one can beat me at, it's an art I've mastered it's the only thing that gets me away from what can hurt me,

I hear a muffled noise as I turn back around to stare at you again, you talk in your sleep you know that right?

You keep repeating the same phrase "only fools fall for you" is it some sort of code?  Are you searching for help? Multiple possible answers keeping flicking through my mind but I just can't point my finger to it, why can I tell what anyone else means but never you?

You're different Jungkook, I like different, I'm scared I'm going to fall for you.

I'm not worried about you catching feelings for me, you'll always love yoongi, and for some reason it hurts, my heart aches everytime I think of it, and I can just imagine us going back, you running into his arms telling him how sorry you are and how much you miss him, and I hate it

I want to kill Yoongi for it, for stealing my property,

You're mine jeon Jungkook I've claimed you, and by kissing me that was the contract being signed,

even if you remain in love with yoongi, I know you're mine, because I've marked you, I sound like some wolf, but when Kim Taehyung marks what's his, the people that dare touch it, well they won't have bodies to touch things with next time.

Your eyes are slowly fluttering awake, like little butterflies, I should stop staring, you might get scared.

I quickly turned back around staring out looking into the sky, is this what people do for enjoyment? How one gets enjoyment by staring at something that won't leave in their lifetime will forever infuriate me

I turn back around, youve gone to sleep again,

Then I remember one very thing, I can't be weak, I just can't.

I think I've said this more than once Jungkook but I'm sorry.
~Jungkook~

I couldn't say I wasn't expecting it, waking up and seeing him gone, but I didn't know it would hurt like this

Well done Jungkook, you fell for the mental boy, and he doesn't like you back, he ran from you.

To get away from you? Maybe, the whole thing a scheme to escape? Maybe.

I fucking hate that I'll never find out, we'll never find you either,

Fuck you Taehyung, you're just like Yoongi, you make me fall for you, then run away, but I know, I know you won't kiss and tell, because clearly you're ashamed, because I'm not as smart as you, or different or-or I don't know,

Because I'm not you Taehyung, and I never will be, so you won't ever fucking like me back.

It's like I'm drawn to fucking crazy people goddamit, I found you so intriguing, so captivating, you clearly just saw me as somebody to fuck around with.

No No, fuck me for thinking you were any different.

Fuck me for thinking you could fall for me too.

Fuck me for liking you.

And finally fuck me for almost loving you.