it's you [malik]

twenty-seven | smoke

I'm so tired.

We landed in Singapore at like 3 o'clock this morning. I have no idea why the flight apparently there was a mix up according to Niall. But I don't really care. It was a bad call. How am I supposed to perform today on 2 hours of sleep?

Im saying 2 because it's 5am right now and I can't go back to sleep. I never can. There's always too much going on in my head. I'm either droning about how Zayn's been missing for 5 days and he probably hates me or about how the girls know i'm cheating on Niall and they think I'm going to ruin the tour. I'm stressed.

These are the moments I wish I could have sex with Zayn. He'd make me forget all about it and just stay calm and relaxed. Plus, I'd probably wouldn't be as sleep deprived either.

Maybe, hes up right now too? He wakes up around this time anyways. He probably won't want to fuck but atleast I can see how he's been doing since everything happened.

I slid out of my bed carefully, untangling Nialls arms from around my waist, hopefully not waking him up. I don't have the patience to deal with his inquisition at 5 o'clock in the morning.

I take the elevator downstairs hoping that his room is still 208. All of our rooms stayed the same number so I'm assuming his did too. I start walking down his hall checking door numbers.

218, 216, 214, 212..

Coincidentally I see familiar jet black hair emerging from a room two doors from where I am.

Fuck. This is embarrassing.

What am I going to say?

I start to turn around so I can just make a run for it before he sees me but then I hear my name coming from that damn accent.

"Alana?"

I turn around slowly to see him literally 4 feet away from me staring down at me with a questioned look on his face.

"Hey Zayn. What's up?" I say failing at trying to sound casual.

"Uhm. Nothing much. I was just about to go take a smoke." he answers then I just nod awkwardly.

"So are you going to tell me why your on my floor at 5 in the morning?" he finally says a hint of amusement in his tone.

"I was taking a walk actually. I couldn't sleep." I lie.

"Right." he smirks knowing he doesn't believe me. God I hate this man.

"Or. You were on your way to my room?" he asked.

Yes.

"No. You're room was just in the way obviously." I lie again and he just nods a growing smile on his face.

"Well. I just got tired so I'm going to go." I say quickly then turn around and start walking away but I feel his hand grab my wrist before I got to far.

"You don't mind smoke do you?"

We took the elevator down to the lobby then he led me down some weird hallway to a back door that was in the middle of an alley.

"So you brought me back here to watch you smoke a cigarette?" I asked.

We've been standing here not talking much. I've just been staring at him. But honestly I don't mind because he looks good as fuck smoking.

"How's Brook?" he asks before taking another drag.

"She's pretty okay. Still shaken up of course but she's getting better." I answer then he nodded.

"How have you been?" I asked slowly.

Why do I feel like its a crime for me to ask? I feel wrong for even caring. Even he looks taken aback by my question.

"I know it's kind of my fault you were even there. And you probably hate me. I don't blame you." I ramble getting nervous.

"I don't hate you Lana. I'm fine." he says shortly.

There he goes with that damn nickname again.

"You know you haven't talked to anyone in days. I wasn't even sure you were in Singapore honestly." I say.

"I've just been minding my business. You know it's okay. You don't have to try to act like you care about me." He says not making eye contact with me.

Ouch.

I just get really quiet regretting trying to actually talk to him.

"So how's the boyfriend?" He teases.

I hate him.

"How's the girlfriend?" I tease back.

"What girlfriend?" he smirks.

Whatt? Did they breakup?

"You guys aren't together anymore?" I asked curiously then he shrugged.

"Its in process." he chuckles. Lies.

"Of course it is." I laughed leaning back on the wall.

He had finished his cig a few minutes ago now we were just standing in a comfortable silence watching the sunrise, or atleast what we can see of it from this back alley. Absolute romance.

"So um. I overheard you talking to that cop. And you said that you didn't need a medic." he says cautiously.

"Well I mean it was just a slap I really don't think he did much damage." I answer.

"No. I mean the other part. You said 'I've gotten much worse' like you've been in a relationship like that before." he continues.

Is he really asking me this right now? I feel my face heat up and I look towards the cement.

"Oh. It's nothing really. It wasn't a boyfriend though. It's the same sad story as everyone else. Alcoholic father abused daughter. Nothing new." I say nervously playing with my hair.

"Im-"

"You don't need to say your sorry I'm fine." I say then he just nodded.

I don't even know why he asked. He doesn't actually care. He literally just told me not to care about him basically but goes on to ask me about my dad. Like what?

He's literally so confusing. And he's an asshole for even making me talk about it because he knew what the story was going to be.

This whole thing was a bad idea. I feel myself walk away without saying anything to him and I just go back upstairs and shower so I don't smell like smoke. I get back in bed with Niall who's still asleep and just try to forget that whole thing ever even happened.