Out of reach (Michael Clifford)

Chapter 17

Michael's POV

"Michael!" Luke called out as I hunched over a bin.

"Michael, are you-oh." He grimaced slightly as I vomited into the bin, the tears in my eyes making it hard for me to see through. "Are you okay, buddy?" He asked, pulling a tissue out of his pocket and handed me it so I could wipe my mouth.

I stuttered, choking on my tears as I tried to explain. "L-Luke" He gave me a questioning look. "It was me. I-I raped Lilac." I managed to say, before spilling my guts out in to the bin again, making Luke take a step back.

"No! No you didn't! Steve did!" He said, rubbing my back as I wiped the mess from my mouth again.

"It-It was after Charlie d-dumped me." I confessed through tears. "I was drunk, and Lilac. Lilac was vulnerable." I spat out, crying out into the night.

"No. You couldn't have raped her. She would have said. Maybe you just scared her. I'm sure-I know." Luke reassured me, nervously as I wiped my eyes, stumbling to the nearest bench. "C-Come on, let's get you inside." He frowned, directing me back into the building, out of the rain.

After I had a glass of water and dried my hair off, we were taking a break in the studio. Ryan and Jade had left us alone, but Calum still lingered around her.

I don't know what he sees in her. She's so fake.

"You alright, buddy?" Ashton spoke softly, patting my back as I just stared at the ground, pitying myself.

"No. I hurt Lilac. It was me." I choked out, clenching a tight fist. "She's out there lost and alone because of ME." I shouted, shooting up from my seat and flipped it over. The whole room went silent.

"M-Michael. It-" Luke attempted to calm me down but I cut him off.

"NO Luke! I did this to her! I don't deserve this! I'm a fucking monster!" I slammed a fist into the wall out of anger.

I was Steve. I am Steve.

"WHAT is going ON HERE?" The manager raised his voice right as I punched the wall, causing a dent. "Michael, I don't know what you're angry about but I can hear your racket down the hall! And this is a SOUNDPROOF ROOM! If you don't SETTLE DOWN and keep it zipped I'll have your contract TERMINATED." He roared, shutting me up.

I nodded, looking down out of shame. Calum and the other two returned to their places by their instruments as Mr Mackerly slammed the door behind him.

What just happened?

"I-I am so sorry." I frowned as the boys nodded. I almost got our band in trouble. Our contract could've been terminated.

"It wasn't your fault, Michael. You were just upset." Nodded Ashton, Jade scoffing. I sent a glare her way, to which she looked away and acted as if nothing happened.

Bitch.