Felicidade

6. Am I wrong?

I don't know what to say and how to thank Diya. She's pretty much a life savior.

Of all the people that I've known for entire 26 years of my life she's the craziest one. She acts like some sort of high profile secretary who is always on her toes to serve her demanding and moody boss. She applied for my admission, got the fees details, scholarship details and how to pay those within a mere 1 day of time. Within 1 day.

How's that possible?

I'll be grateful to her forever. The only issue is that my departure has been scheduled 1 month after hers. And I've to submit a thesis paper within 1st Oct. Based on that only they'll decide about my scholarship. I didn't have the guts to apply for foreign student's scholarship. But Diya screamed near my ear, "Bitch, you're a fucking gold-medalist. Why won't you apply for a scholarship?"

Ohh!!! I've so many things to do. My parents are actually happy with my decision. They're ready to invest all their savings for this. My parents never thought about getting me married at mid twenties like others. They saved money for my higher education.

I don't have any boyfriend or such a friend who'll be actually sad about this decision. And the only friend that I have is going to stay with me. So there's nothing to worry about.

But what about him?

I get lost in my thoughts in the middle of collecting topics for my thesis.

Who am I doing this for? How will he feel about it? Am I acting clingy? What if he actually doesn't care about a girl from a completely different country?

Ummm....wait...we're from same continent. Why won't he care? I laugh at my own delusional thoughts. I take my phone and text him...

"Jin, are you there?"
I wait......wait....and wait.....

After 5 long minutes which felt like 5 years he replies, "Yes, tell me."

"I have got things to say to you. It was supposed to be surprise, But I couldn't keep it within myself." I reply with a pounding heart.

"Yeah, say it. What?"
And again....
"Wait, are you going to say that you're pregnant?" Jin replies with LOL emoticons.

I'm going to kill this guy once I get there. "Fuck, No. I'm single." I reply while rolling over on my bed laughing.

"Then what is it?" He seems curious.

"I'm coming to Korea Jin. For study." I reply with my heart in my mouth. I whisper under my breath, "for you Jin, I'm going to Korea for you."

It's a long pause.....1 minute....2 minutes....3......4.....5.....I see the green round sign beside his name turning into red. He's unavailable. I stay like a stone for 10 minutes.

Have I just made a fool out of myself? Why didn't he react anything? How could he do this to me? He doesn't even care a little bit for me? What am I going to do now?

I see my reflection in the mirror opposite to my bed. I see her laughing.

"Did he commit that he'll take care of you if you go there? Did he for even once said that he cares for you? Did you just get dumped by yet another charmer?"

I keep sitting on my bed like a thousand years have passed. My whole world collapses at that very moment.