Clout Chase ~ Chasing the dream

I love you Grayson Dolan

Ronnie's POV

I decided to put my laptop down put on shoes get in my car and finally face him it's been almost a week since he has said a word to me.

I pull up to their house, I knew he was home since both his and Ethan's car were parked outside.

I ring the bell, then as I see my reflection in the mirror I think to myself what the fuck was I thinking coming to Grayson Dolan'S the guy I'm not sure if I'm in love with who happens to be the hottest guy I have probably met like ever, looking like a fucking potato.

"Ronnie?" A confused Ethan gets my attention as he opens the door. "Sorry did I wake you guys up?" I ask as I see he was in his boxers and with a sweater.

"No no I was just in my room, come in" he says. "Thank you Umm is Grayson here?" I ask. "Yeah he's in his room, you can go there me and Emma are in my room if you need us" he says with a smile.

"Okay I will be right back I just need to Umm talk to him" I say.

I walk up to the room. Then I think to myself. Maybe he really is over me, maybe I shouldn't tell him how I feel and just leave it as friends. I'm not even sure how I feel.

I keep thinking over and over then Grayson opens the door and he has a suprised facial look but he's eyes wet red and he looked a mess, like he was crying.

"Grayson?" I ask while sighing trying to to wipe the the tear that was falling from his eye. He moves his head and closes his eyes to face the other side once my hand comes in contact with his cheek.

"What are you doing here?" He asks in a raspy weak voice. "Why are you crying?" I ask. He just shrugs his shoulders and moves back to sit on his bed.

I shut the door behind me and freeze in the spot not knowing what to say next. "Why are you here Ronnie" he asks finally looking at me but with a cold stare that gave me chills.

"Why are you so mad at me Grayson" I ask. "Because.." he sighs. "Because what?" I come closer and kneel down to him.

"I'm not mad at you okay. I'm mad at myself, I thought that by you kissing me back it meant you felt something back but I was wrong and had to learn it the hard way by you running off. I don't know what I was thinking, you're not even over Logan yet" he says.

"Grayson, look at me" I say and so he does. His green hazel looking eyes that are red filled with tears and sadness that I caused made my heart break.

"That kiss wasn't just in the moment" I say and his eyes light up.

"I don't know how I feel okay I'm confused, so confused. But I do know one thing is that I'm over Logan." I say.

"But Grayson I'm not ready for a relationship at least not now. Ever since high school I haven't had a long time all to myself to find out who I am"

"And I think you need to be happy and if me and you happen right now both of us won't be fully happy. I am not what you're looking for, you're perfect Grayson, there's not a bad bone in your body. But I'm a mess. For me to put that kind of weight on your shoulders it's unfair" I sigh as a tear leaves down my cheek.

"I'm so so sorry, I wish I could be who you thought I was. But trust me a guy like you can't like someone like me." I sigh once again.

"Ronnie a girl like you is what every guy wishes they had. Sure you're not perfect but to me you are. No one is perfect especially me. I understand and I'm sorry for putting you on the spot" Grayson kneels down next to me.

He hugs me gently and wraps his arms around me.

From that moment on I knew how I felt. How he's caring gentle touch made me feel. How every time he speaks makes my heart race faster. How sweaty my palms get every time he looks at me.

I am in Love with Grayson Dolan and the fact that I just told him me and him can't happen broke my heart.

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Until next time, X