His Glimmer Of Hope

Chapter 14

After awhile, Jaylen went to the dining room and sighed, feeling awkward and out of place even though his biological mother is there. As he is eating silently as usual, a male idol came on television due to an advertisement and his step-father, started making noise, saying things along those homophobic lines and even though it is not aimed directly at Jaylen, he still felt hurt and what makes it worse is that his own mother, agreed with the man.

Once Jaylen is done eating and washing his own dishes, which his step-father says is 'selfish' of him since he did not wash the other dishes, Jaylen just simply rolled his eyes in annoyance and went into his room, locking the door. As he laid on the bed, staring at the plain white ceiling, tears slowly rolled down from both of his eyes. The more he stared at the ceiling, the more his brain thinks and the more hurt he feels in his heart.

Even before he knows it, his right hand is already holding onto the pen-knife and both his sleeves are rolled up. When he finally calmed down, he noticed blood forming, filling up the new cuts that are on his wrists. His tears kept unknowingly falling. Even though the hurt is gone, a new feeling replaced it, regretting he had done what he did. Once his tears finally stopped, he is feeling empty once more. He slowly got up from the floor and bandaged his new wounds. He sighed as he kept the pen-knife back into his bag.

Once everything is cleaned, not a drip of blood or evidence showing he harmed himself, he laid on the bed and just stared at Kujo's number. *Will he hate me if he knew what i did? Will he hate me as much as i hate myself? Will he think i'm an attention-seeker like everybody else?* Lots of thoughts over took his mind but his train of thoughts is being disturbed when a message notification popped up and his eyes widened when Jaylen saw who it was from.

When his shock slowly disappeared, he pressed the notification. "I hope you are not asleep right now but if you are, have a sweet dream. Anyways, i'm surprised you gave me your phone number as well. Thank you Jay. And feel free to text or call me. I'll be waiting for you." Kujo texted Jaylen on a messaging app and Jaylen smiled a little at the text. "Thanks for giving me your phone number as well. It was really unexpected." Jaylen replied back. "I think i'm a really lucky fan :)" He added.

He then laid on the bed, trying to sleep away all those negative feelings and emotions inside of him. Kujo saw the message and chuckled. *He is really cute.* He thought in his mind and closed the messaging app, already anticipating when their next meeting will be.

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Quote #13:

"Some scars don't hurt. Some scars are numb. Some scars rid you of the capacity to feel anything ever again."

-Joyce Rachelle