withering leaves ❁ yoonmin

XVII

March 2, 2013

Dear Jeon Jungkook-ssi,

Maknae, I'll start off this letter by saying one thing and one thing only. Stop doubting yourself. You will never be perfect and that's okay. You're amazing the way you are. Everyone in Bangtan is so lucky to have you as our maknae, our little baby brother.

You may be annoying sometimes (a lot of the time) but you're still family. We will always love you.

I remember when I first met you. You were shy and tiny and pretty much mute. You refused to speak to any of us in the dorm. But then you connected with Namjoon-ssi and I. When Hoseok-ssi packed his bags to go, you were crying the hardest. When everyone else needed support, you were there, feeling the same emotions they did. I know when I'm gone, you'll probably be crying the hardest. It's not your fault. Not by a long shot.

Jungkook-ssi, you are the perfect accumulation of all of Bangtans' personalities. Somehow, you've gotten the best out of all of us and turned it into your own little soup of a person. It makes us all feel like you're our blood relative. I'm so happy to have seen you grow this much. I just wish I could see you grow even more. See how much of an impact you'll leave on others.

Today, just earlier before the fansign, I remember you feeling really down about being behind on one of the moves somewhere in the first chorus of Boy In Luv. I don't think anyone really noticed-not even the producers who are so goddamn anal about those kinds of things-but you were upset. And then you got more upset because you were being so upset.

Jungkook-ssi, you're not always expected to be perfect. I know you were basically raised in this industry, you've been with BigHit since you were maybe thirteen years old, but you're not a programmed robot. It's okay to be a fraction of a second off and it's okay to feel emotional. You're not overreacting (okay maybe just a little bit) but I know this is a really stressful period of time.

Like I said, don't cry too much when I'm gone. It's not your fault. There's no way you could've done anything about it. I hope my experience with soulmates won't ruin your experience. I mean, I'm pretty sure you and your soulmate will get along just fine.

When I'm gone, you'll probably take over most of my lines. Or Hoseok-ssi. Whoever. I wonder if ARMYs in the future will remember how my voice sounded on the tracks. Or if I'll just be forgotten.

I love you. Never forget that, Jungkook-ssi.

Love,
You-know-who

.

The members sat around the breakfast table one bleak Sunday morning, pondering the loss of one of their members in the middle of the night. Normally, if it were any other case, it would have been cause for concern, but said missing member had left a single note on the kitchen table.

Be gone until 9:00 AM. Don't wait up for me. -Hoseok

Seokjin, the early riser, padded the kitchen first and immediately ran back into the room, searching Hoseok's bed and waking everyone up when he began to freak out. Yoongi, the very last one up the night before, remembers Hoseok getting into bed early-earlier than even Jimin. It was just past 6:00. What time had Hoseok gotten up so that all the members were still deeply asleep?

His phone was still charging, nestled in the mess of phone chargers and cases in their room, plugged into the multi-outlet extension cord Namjoon had smuggled from one of the computer rooms in BigHit. Hoseok had no way to contact them unless he was with someone else.

"We all just have to trust him. He left a note, we know he's not missing," Namjoon reasoned with the rest of the group, too paranoid to eat. Instead, their haphazardly-heated leftovers were left on the table to cool.